Over the Garden Wall Review: Into the Unknown & The Unknown (The Final Review)

Well, everybody.
The end has finally come. Over the Garden Wall has reached its final two chapters, and even though it's sad to watch this end, it's worth it to say that all good things must come to an end, and this series was so damn good (pardon my language again). Watching this for the past five days have been worth all the hype, all the wait, and the embarrassing tweets I've sent on Twitter, all the fan-page accounts that I've followed (okay only two, but it's worth it because they follow me back too) and all the tweets that creator Patrick McHale favorited (okay, also only two, but I'm grateful he even faved just only one). So with a heavy heart, hazy eyes and painful fingers, it's time for the final review of Over the Garden Wall.

When we left off, Greg was caught in a trap by The Beast, and Wirt, with no one to blame but himself, tries to look for him, but failed, having nearly died twice befor being saved by Beatrice. And now, he must face his biggest fears: losing his little brother and The Beast. But that won't happen, yet.

First, we begin Chapter 9: "Into the Unknown"

with a flashback of Wirt in his room, painfully saddened, and begins to makes a decision, and that decision is to put on a costume, go outside, and give a mixtape to a girl named Sara, a girl he likes. It's Halloween night. He goes to a football game, when Sara is. Greg comes from a neighbor's house with candy and takes the tape and gives it to her friends, and Wirt snaps. The brothers try to find take the tape (now in her jacket), but are caught and fail. They try again and find her at a party, unsuccesfully going through her jacket again. Later, we meet her date (and Wirt's probable rival), Jason Funderberger, who turns out to be a goofy-looking dude, but she likes him. Later on, they tail Sara, Jason Funderberger and some friends to a cemetery, to no avail on the tape thing. Greg embarrasses Wirt even more, which he finds horrible. Suddenly, everyone is caught by police. Sara and her friends leave, while Wirt and Greg are cornered. They climb a tree to the top of a wall, hoping to run back and go back on their mission, and climb down on the other side. Unfortunately, that doesn't happen. Wirt goes berzerk at Greg for being in his life (along with Greg's father, whom he doesn't like; they're stepbrothers after all), ruining his life for being around, and wants nothing to him. Then a train comes; Wirt pushes Greg out of the way. And this is where things get worse. Wirt and Greg fall several feet down an embankment and into a river, knocked unconscious.
Wirt then wakes up in a cave surrounded around bluebirds. He's in the tree cove of Beatrice's family. Now that Wirt is back to heath (and eating dirt for treatment), he can now find The Beast and save Gregory.

You see, it all makes sense now. Wirt and Greg are from the 1980s, and the clothes they worn that we thought were normal 1920s garb, was just costumes they wore for Halloween, and that "Garden Wall" they climbed was just the blocking wall of a cemetery they went to with Sara and his friends. And when they jumped over it, they fall several feet behind into the river below, and that jump-started the entire series. The entire series was just Wirt's imagination. And the many things he said here, like him being in high school, him saying "Smell ya Later" to Lorna in a time when no one says this, him embarrassingly saying that he does poetry to himself and plays clarinet, and make more sense because he's a awkward, shy, introverted kid from the 80s. And everything ties together here.
Seeing Wirt in the real world before the start was very endearing and like any teenager going through problems like he has, those problems that he faced felt real and something we all can relate to. His big crush on Sara, the anger and jealousy of seeing her with another guy, and annoyance and intolerance from Greg's antics. Many teens have gone through that (including me) so I applaud the writers for making this chapter so good.

And now the final chapter of Over The Garden Wall, Chapter 10: The Unknown.

Beatrice is flying through the snow and finds footsteps, which bring her to Greg, conversing with The Beast over an item he found for the latter. The wind blows Bea away, causing her to run into Wirt, who's looking for Greg. They then begin their trek to find him.
Meanwhile, Woodsman finds some wood to burn in his lantern, and hears someone singing; it's Beast with Greg, trapped in branches. Beast then tells Woodsman that he has another soul for the light, meaning he's about to...take Greg away. Woodsman begs Beast no to do so, not knowing that the light is souls of children he kept for many years, including what could be his daughter and Greg. Shocked and horrified, Woodsman tries to save Greg .
Wirt and Bea (now with Woodsman's lantern in tow) find Greg in the empty part of the forest wrapped in wood branches. They then are face-to-face with Beast, who plans to finish off Greg when the light in the lantern goes dark. Wirt then learns that the light is Beast's soul and opens the inside, releasing the light and ends the reign and terror of The Beast, along with his life. Wirt then goes to Greg and admits the entire thing was his fault, and that he shouldn't have put the blame on his brother in the first place. Then with the lantern in tow, With goes face to face with Beast, realizing that the only thing keeping the lantern lit wasn't the souls of children, but his own. Wirt opens the lantern, and blows out the light, almost destroying the Beast. He carries Greg and they begin their way. Bea goes home to her family and Woodsman finally kills the Beast to find his daughter.
Greg is saved from his doom, Woodsman is free from The Beast's reign, an Beatrice now has the thing she needs for her and her family to be humans again, Wirt and Greg are finally (and this time, I mean finally) on their way home.
But first, Wirt comes to, grabs Greg and leaves the river, where police and their parents are looking for them. They are rushed to the hospital. This was all Wirt's imagination.
He wakes to Sara, who tells he and Greg are in the hospital. They are just fine, and Greg tell other patients what happened, including Jason Funderberger (not the guy, Greg's pet frog--no, Wirt and Greg's pet frog. Wirt then talks with Sara about the mixtape, but she interjects that she doesn't have a record player. But he says that they can play it at his house. But first, they'll have to get through other mixtapes he made, and then, go all the way to the top, and then they can--oh man! Now I'm typing like Wirt's talking. I guess that's how I write these reviews, I guess.

And in the end,
-Woodman reunites with his daughter,
-Lorna is still enjoying life with Auntie Whistles,
-Quincy Endicott and Fred the horse (now his tea packing horse) being the best of friends
-Beatrice and her family are humans once more,
Wirt and Greg are back home,
Wirt gets the girl, and Greg has a new pet.

You know, expected a big final face-off between Wirt, Greg, Beatrice and The Beast. Although that didn't happen, I was very satisfied with what I had. I'm very happy everyone has a happy ending. Just like I'm happy for this series. Man, this series is good. All the twists and turn that would make your head spin, all the funny moments (80% of them coming from Greg of course), all the shocking twists and the amazing places we've seen, this series has it all.

Final time for Random Thoughts
--Jason Funderburger is such a Fogell from Superbad.
--That rad 80's music from this chapter was so cool beans. I wish that was really a part of the soundtrack.
--HOLY SHIT, THAT FALL.
--I really like Beatrice family. They're so tight-knit and friendly; you wouldn't notice any bad things.. I understand why Beatrice had that self-exile now.
--I'd be lying if I'd say I wasn't like Wirt as a teenager.
--Even in the real world, Greg is boss
--I'be lying if I didn't say I'd cry like hell if Greg died under the Beast's power.
--Sara is a really hot gitl...She is lucky to have Wirt,

--Thank you, Patrick McHale for such a magnificent series. I applaud you, the producers who put this together, the writer for putting together uch a story, the animators for making such beautiful scenery, and the actors for putting so much work and effort into their characters and making them look so complex and believable. I've never seen an animated mini-series before (but I'm sure this won't be the last), and I've never seen one as put-together as this before. I can't think of how much I love this series now.

Well, thank you all for joining me for this 5-day engagement in to the annal of my mind for such a beautful series. I'm so grateful for the love and pageviews I've received and that you've put up with my terrible reviewing skills. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
So, I'll see you next time for the other crap I'm doing.
Goodnight!

Special SLMR: The Music of Over the Garden Wall

Hi, everyone.
If you’ve been watching this new mini-series on Cartoon Network called Over the Garden Wall, or have been looking at this blog’s Twitter page for the past few weeks, you may have known a little about the series and its’ music. It’s featured within its’ chapters on-screen and on a section of it on the Network’s YouTube channel. And by golly, is it really, really good. So good, it’s almost like nothing I’ve heard before in a series (or even movie) soundtrack. Mostly because the music is very authentic in its sound and concepts. Everything is very 1920s and Antebellum in concept, and sounds beautifully in execution. So I’m dedicating this edition of Short/Long Music Review to the Music of Over the Garden Wall.

The music was arranged and recorded by The Blasting Company, an Ethnic/Folk/Dance music producing group from Tennessee, consisting of Josh, Justin, Charles, Brandon, Cory, Chief and Daniel, plus female members Clara, Kat and Jessica. I've never heard of them before after the series was announced earlier this year, but I certainly will know this name after it ends. The music they make is absolutely wonderful. A perfect mash of old-fashioned sound and modern-day indie in such a really nice package. I love each and every song in their own very unique way, so I’m gonna describe how much I love each song in their own little package of reviews.

Let’s start with T--”Over the Garden Wall” (a namesake song). With vocals by Chris Isaak, the song features a perfect ragtime sound with flourishes of drums and trumpets and accordion that just sounds really good without the instruments overlapping a lot. This is something you and your lady friend can dance to or snuggle up to. It’s perfect for almost anything.

Next is H--"Into the Unknown". This one is about the danger that lurks within the woods. Also sung by Chris Isaak, this one features nothing but a great piano session, which starts off dark and dreary, but later becomes warm and inviting, and his vocals mesh wonderfully wirh it. Halfway through the song, Isaak give us a haunting spoken work verse about the dangers and evil the are hidden deep within the titular Unknown, which sounds just as good as the previous one.

After that is E--”Like Ships”. A smooth piano ballard about two people coming together in love, like ships on a winding river. Sung by Elijah Wood and Shannon Sossamon, the voice of Lorna--First off, I will say that Elijah has a really nice singing voice, something I never realized about him, and second, their voices mesh wonderfully here. This is a simple love ballad that just blooms from start to finish.

My absolute favorite is the next track, U--"Patient is the Night". Sung (again) by the great Chris Isaak, this piece is about working all day until sunset and eager to see your lover’s beautiful face. And even though this concept is very simple, these lyrics make them complex and I just love everything about this one. The lush piano background, the quiet cymbals, Isaak vocals (which are the best to me), and the whistling piece near the end. And speaking of the end, the it just sends shivers all over your body. The first time I heard this, I almost cried (Seriously, I was misty-eyed and ready to leak) and every time the end comes, the same thing happens. The emotion, power, passion and overall feeling from this song just takes your emotions and dances with them (not to make you feel bad, but to make you feel good, happy and appreciate the night sky even more). All of these reasons and many unexplainable ones is why I truly love this song. This is a song I just wanna play on repeat and never get tired. And if I die, I want this to be the song I hear before I pass on.

N2--"Come Wayward Souls" is another short haunting tune about committing yourself to the evil and scary, with accordion played throughout and vocals by Samuel Samey, the voice of the Beast. This is one I won't be playing a lot anytime soon.

In K--”The Highwayman Song”, the titular Highwayman sings about what he does for a living, but don’t cross him, or else you’re left with a bloody face and cold feet. This one easily sounds like the scariest of them all, with the haunting instruments and HWM’s big booming vocals, this one will absolutely leave you running for cover...or your parents.

N2--”Forward, Oneiroi!” is an opera bit that includes amazing string and wind and beautiful vocals by . It feels slow (in a good way, I swear!!) but quick-moving, and when you hear this, it’s like watching an actual opera in the 1920s or lying down on a field by a river and daydreaming away or sitting at home and sleeping through Great Performances, or a combination of the three.

Moving on, we have O--”The Courting Song”. It’s about (what else?) what happens on the road to getting married. Attire, rings, vows, cake, things you’re to young to know about (sex); everything that happens after popping the question. This is the song I was introduced to when hearing of the series. And it quickly (and really) left an impression on me of the series’ music’s concept and feel of the Roaring 20s. The old-piano sound, the quick, muffled and elderly sounding vocals, and the some of the lyrics definitely feature words that have been used in the old century. And as I realized after hearing this song, it was a thing to get married at a young age way back then, and that makes this song even better.

Following is W--”Langtree’s Lament”. Sung by namesake Ms. Langtree (voiced in the series by Janet Klein, who also performs the song), this song is about the man she loved, her wondering why he leaves her, and how heartbroken she is. Another simple concept, but what makes it also more complex, and therefore making this song so amazing is its excellent and genius use of the Alphabet to explain and accentuate the story. Whether to use a letter to represent the start of a word or a word itself makes it so special. Plus, Langtree’s voice has a very nice modern-day indie feel to it, without shying away from the important old-time groove.

And finally, N3 (to tell the letters apart) --”Potatoes and Molasses”.

With vocals by the voice of Gregory, Colin Dean, this final song is about the desire for the delicious meal after a long morning of school time. Greg’s voice and Colin’s vocals make you feel really happy from hearing them (and watching Greg on the series, this truly makes sense). The added band of instruments make it make it pop even more, and the song (like all the others) is just a gem of beauty and wonder.

Sadly, when I hear old man Langtree shout “That’s enough!”, not only is this song over, but we’ve reached the end of all of the Music of Over the Garden Wall. I wish there was more to hear because the everything about these songs were just impossibly perfect, but I'm actually entirely grateful for the song I have been given. Each and every one is just worth listening and pretty much worth your time. Even if you don't watch (and you really should watch) or don't like (how could you not like this) Over the Garden Wall, you would love the songs of the series. I swear on my life, you'll enjoy them, and if you don't...make better life choices.

And now, I present the 5 songs I love out of all of them. I love them all very much, but these five are my favorites.

5-Langtree’s Lament--for its genius use of the Alphabet
4-Into the Unknown--for its beautiful use of piano play and Chris Isaak's vocals
3-The Courting Song--For the hilarious take on young love and marriage,
2-Potatoes and Molasses--For Colin Dean. This dude is really talented,
1-Patient is the Night--For everything about it

lso love the appreciation the series' music has been getting from viewers (like yours truly, obviously). Many fans have loved the music for its true authentic sound and very close proximity to the music of the Roaring 20s. I ready many comments on each of the video's pages, and every single one is about how much the certain song or about how great the series is.

The Blasting Company, I applaud each and every one of all of you for the music you guys have made for this series. Your talent just shows here and will leave a lasting impression on animation, TV in general and all of music.
Well, this series is just a perfect piece of animation and it music is just perfect in every way.

Over the Garden Wall Review: The Ringing of the Bell & Babes in the Woods

Welcome back, everyone. I hope you've settled with the crap of the last 3 reviews and will enjoy this review of Over the Garden Wall even better. We've almost reached the home stretch as Wirt and Gregory may be close to home...or so we thought, because this is Over the Garden Wall.

Here is the story so far:
Wirt is pissed with Beatrice, and Gregory is...just being Gregory (which is just great). Just as he and Greg finally went to Adelaide's, they have been pulled into a horrible trap in which she plans to use them as child slaves, and Beatrice wanted a pawn so she can be human again, something, after warming up to the boys, she doesn't want happening. This severed their friendship for good (like the pair of scissors Adelaide owned. Owned is the key word, because she later died from the night air, like...you know)
We left off Beatrice is still at the crime scene hurt and ashamed in herself, and as the brothers continue walking on their journey back home.

As we start Chapter 7: The Ringing of the Bell,

Bea searches through Adelaide's home, no reason, still ashamed.
Meanwhile, Wirt and Greg are walking in the rain. Greg talks to Wirt about Beatrice, which the latter does not want to do. Then Wirt is trapped by the Woodsman, who continues his cryptic sermon of Beware, Untrue, Terror and Tree-killing. But Woodsman is actually trying to warn them of further danger when still going through the forest. By kicking his lantern away, Wirt escapes in time before the Beast appears.
The two run into the house of a witch doctor named Auntie Whispers, who uses hypnotism to command people to do things (as she does here with her "niece", Lorna) just by ringing a magical bell. (It's just in the title).

Lorna is sick, but Whistles could not ask others make her well. When she goes upstairs, Wirt and Greg help her with her chores, and just then, Wirt begins a crush on her. When Greg tries to catch his ever-renamed frog upstairs, they wake Whispers, who wants to eat them for trespassing and wants Lorna by her side, which doesn't happen. They hide in the closet; BIG MISTAKE. Lorna turns into a spirit-possessed monster and almost kills the brothers before Wirt throws himself and Greg out the window and escape. Because the New WB Frog swallowed the "Ringing of the Bell" Bell earlier, they (well, mostly Wirt) found the chance to defeat the spirit and save Lorna, who is now well. She and Whispers thank the two for their heroic deed, and, grateful for the love and care Whispers gave to her, Lorna decides to stay with Whispers. Wirt is saddened. At the end, Woodsman chats with The Beast, wanting it to stay away from the brothers, with Beast warning that this would not help him, as his daughter's life is at stake.

If you thought that Whispers would be the threat of the episode (including me), you were wrong. Horribly wrong. If Woodsman wanted to keep the two away from the Unknown, he should've said so. He associates himself with The Beast anyway, and he causes some of the crap on them, so what use is there to say all these things? Oh that's right, he loves his daughter. And the Woodsman is just the biggest anti-hero I've ever seen.

In the next chapter, Babes in the Woods,

Beatrice comes back, well briefly, to find the brothers, but to no avail. Meanwhile, Wirt and Greg are travelling by...a makeshift boat out of an outhouse to the next place they'll end up. Wirt is heartbroken by his departing with Lorna and just doesn't feel like anything anything anymore. He also asks Greg to stop feeling happy all the time, blames him for getting lost in the first place and leaves responsibility of going home to him, not caring about anything anymore. The two later lay their heads on a tree and rest.
Greg looks into the the stars and recites and old folklore, and dreams of a colorful, magical land of happiness and deity above the clouds, with angels and animals and singing abound. Later on after all the happiness, The Queen of the Clouds comes to Greg and tells him that Wirt is hopelessly in failure and refuses to come back to reality. Greg then asks for a way back home, and the Queen gives him one. As it turns out, the Queen is actually The Beast, brainwashing Greg into joining him in the Unknown. When Wirt finally wakes up and snaps out of his morose state, he realizes his carelessness put his brother in danger. He desperately looks for Greg, but slips on snow and falls to the ground, knocked unconscious, but gets back up, only to fall through thin ice and into cold, frigid water, nearly drowning. Fortunately, he is saved by a net, which is pulled into a boat by the fishing fish...which Beatrice is in. Bea tries to get Wirt to come to and ask where Greg is, but it's no use...Chapter ends, Hearts broken, Countdown to the end begins.

This half hour is just "Let's See How Much We Can Make Wirt Sad, Part 2 & 3" (Part 1 was Chapter 6). Wirt is realizing that hiding his feelings and running away from his problems and fears are beginning to come back bite him, and although he's finally toughened up and has done thing things on his own, he goes back to old characterization, which screws him over hard later on. Meanwhile, I just love Babes in the Woods. The animation and songs remind me of the classic cartoons of the by animators like Tex Avery and . The parts after the homage truly ramps up the intense fear and, with Greg going with The Beast, Wirt looking for him and failing hard, and Be being genuinely worried for both of them. This really shows how close these three have become since the beginning of the series, and I love how everything just kills any hope we have of them going home again and just realize that we have a couple chapters left before it does happen. Plus, they reach The Unknown.

Random Thoughts:
Chapter 7:
--Greg may have powers; no he doesn't. It's still cute though.
--Dear God, Auntie Whistles is huge! It's like her stature already tells us that she's already Someone needs to get her some toothpaste.
-- From seeing Whispers eat a black turtle, I can say as happy as I am, "Thank God Lorna is not related".
--Wirt and Lorna seem wonderful together. I can tell from the shapes of their noses. The song they sing "Like Ships" is just a beautiful love ballad.
--It seems like when we all thought Whispers would be the threat...
--It seems Auntie Whispers may be related to Adelaide.
--Tim Curry was amazing as Auntie Whispers, completely different from his many other roles (I swear I didn't know he was in this before calling Enoch in Chapter 2 "Pumpkin Pennywise".)
Chapter 8:
--fish fishing for fish. Logic is screwed-up.
--Suddenly, I'm craving for the classic cartoons I enjoyed watching when I was a kid. Dollar-store DVDs, here I come!!
--Thank God I know that they'll be back together tomorrow.

Well, folks, the time has come. In less than 20 hours, the story of Over the Garden Wall comes to an end. The final battle begins, the reunion of (but I swear to God, I haven't seen it yet.) I gonna cry. See you tomorrow. Good---goo-goo-good...(sniff) Niiiigghhttt. (cries)

Over The Garden Review: Mad Love & Lullaby in Frogland

Hidey-ho, everyone. The obsession continues as another pair of chapters are in the books (well, broadcast TV books; and ha, pun). And now, here's what I think of them in the next edition of my review of Over the Garden Wall.

Chapter 5, Mad Love

begins as Wirt, Gregory and Beatrice go to a beautiful mansion, where inside lives an old man named Quincy Endicott, a tea company tyccoon who is--use a higher term--off his rocker (And I mean it and a very sorrowful AND humorous sense). He believes there is a ghost in his house, and wants it gone, despite that his fear of said ghost can't get him to do so. Plus, he believes the brothers to be his nephews. That's because Beatrice is scamming him in believing so just to dip into his money for a ferry ride to Adelaide.
Meanwhile, Wirt and Bea are searching for money and look into a closet, where they end up trapped. There, they have an chat about dark secrets. Beatrice slips that she used to be a human. She later reveals that previously she threw a rock at a bluebird, and in turn, she and her family were cursed, and were turned into bluebirds for the rest of their lives. (damn) When Wirt reveals his dark secrets in return, they aren't really that bad: He likes to recite poetry to himself at night, plays clarinet, and has a huge crush on a girl. Plus he knows interior design well. (Okay?)
I felt very sorry for Beatrice to have this fate bestowed upon her and her family. Even though throwing a rock at a bird is wrong, it was really cruel for them.

Meanwhile, Greg, Fred and Endicott look around the garden for the ghost. It's later revealed that the ghost that Endicott feared for all these years is actually a woman who is alive and well, and his competitor in the tea business: Marguerite Grey. Their houses were connected because of how huge they are. The two late fall in love, and thank Greg for his good deed in erasing their fears.

At first, there was definitely no way you would not feel sorry for him. You may have thought he needed help and soon, but because of his money and status among the wealthy, and because of the time period this series takes place in he can't get. And despite the more funny things he did here, it makes me feel guilty for laughing. But then things turned right around for the better by the end. Despite the bragging of his money, Endicott is a very nice guy, sweet and generous.
Also, it was very unfair for the three to steal money from him by posing as family. I know they need a ride

Next up, Chapter 6: Lullaby in Frogland

Wirt, Greg and Beatrice are taking a ride on a steamboat populated by frogs. The stepbrothers are happy to be closer to seeing Adelaide, and close to going home again. But because of one minor mistake (Greg's frog George has no clothes) the heroes are chased by security and end up hiding in Wirt's coaty-capey-thing (Greg is masked by a drum) to avoid being arrested. They end up playing in a band, with Wirh doing well playing bassoon, Greg playing his drum-face and his frog singing. That's cool. Finally, they get off the boat, into mud (the frogs are hibernating) and later, Bea goes to find Adelaide a little early. Wirt and Greg follow her. Things may have seemed well...
Only to reveal that Adelaide is a crazy old bitch (pardon my language) who wants to use Wirt and Greg as slaves, with the two believing that Beatrice was using their friendship for her benefit.
I've never felt so heartbroken. All when Wirt and Betrice were beginning to become friends, Adelaide happened. And speaking of Adelaide, that was shocking. Tricking the brothers to believing that she was a nice lady, when she wanted them to cater her every whim no reason, all in exchange for Bea to become human again. That's just painful. And just like that another two chapters end, leaving us with bad tastes in our mouths, and more eager to wonder what happens tomorrow when Wirt and Greg go closer Into the Unknown.

Random Thoughts time:
Chapter 5:
--Endicott brags about his money more than every modern-day rapper combined.
--I like Fred the Horse. Mostly because his voice is very familiar to me.
--Ha, Unkie. Greg is such a sweetie.
--Sure, Wirt. Ask the ONLY OTHER PERSON in a locked closet, if she is still there. (Now I see what Bea puts up with)
--Is it just me, or is Wirt just a nerd?
--Two compititors in love. Isn't that sweet?
Chapter 6:
--As funny as that sounded, and even though Greg was a little foolish for throwing the money in a fountain earlier, Wirt putting blame on Greg wasn't cool in the slightest.
--Greg with a drum on his face is my new spirit animal.
--That moment when the officers and waiter stepped on the tadpoles (BABIES) really grossed me out. That was just (gagging)
--I now hate Adelaide.
--And my big love for Beatrice has gone back to huge like. And yet I still feel sorry for her.

Well, that's it for now. tune in at the same time tomorrow for Chapters 7 & 8, The Ringing of the Bell and Babes in the Woods.
Goodnight!

Over The Garden Wall Review: Schooltown Follies & Songs of the Dark Latern

Hey, everyone. Welcome back to my review of Over The Garden Wall. This time complete and ready to go at 11pm.
Well, what a start that was, huh? I've never been pulled into a show like this since...well, I'm like this to a lot of animated shows, but I've never been excited for one this much since this series. And I was satisfied with what I saw last night, and wanted more. Which is why I'm happy those 24 hours went by so quickly when the next two chapters came in.


Up first...

After the pseudo-nightmare that is Pottsfield, Wirt, Gregory and Beatrice continue on their trek to Adelaide's house. After Wirt's shoe is untied, Bea gets annoyed with Wirt and asks Greg if he wants to be like Wirt, (as she claims) always does what he's told, pathetic, a pushover. Wirt is angered by this.

Wandering off, Greg finds a schoolhouse. Wirt and Beatrice go inside just as class has started. When they go in, Wirt decides to give Bea payback by--well, being a pushover. The teacher, Ms. Langtree, begins class by talking about the recent troubles in her life; the school closing down, her lover Jimmy Brown leaving her unexpectedly, and a crazed gorilla on the loose. She then sings a song about Brown.

Meanwhile, outside, refusing to go in, Greg meets some new friends and play a game called "Too Old Cat" (basically finding cats that are wrinkly and barely mobile). While Doing so, his possum friend looks in the bushes and finds a GORILLA!! The gorilla chases the guys around the school until possum friend knocks it out with a swift hit to the head via a branch.

After the bell rings (thanks Greg and friends climbing it after the GORILLA! attack), the children (and Wirt and Greg) go to lunch (or Meal Time as Ms. Langtree calls it), where the eat on a dull and bland lunch of potatoes. Greg finds something great out of it in the form of a jar of Molasses, by mixing the two together, and sings "Potatoes and Molasses", a song about this delicious mixture...until a man in a big coat comes in and stops the proceedings. He complains that if he wants to keep a school for animals to learn to read and write open, they must not have fun and play music. He then takes their instruments away, and sends them to bed (takes "schoolhouse" a bit too literal, doesn't it?)

During bedtime, Greg decides to bust out and leave with Wirt tagging along and asking for a plan, which Greg doesn't have. Then, somewhat conveniently, they find Old Man Langtree behind the bushes, moping about his troubles surrounding the school he tries to keep open (he gave up his life savings, home and everything else he's owned to save it; and he plans on selling the animal kids' instruments to keep it running), his daughter (Jimmy Brown left his little girl heartbroken) and the gorilla on the loose, and wishes that things in the world would go good for once. Greg then finally has his plan: steal the instruments.

The next morning, Old Man Langtree wakes up to find the instruments stolen and wonders where they are. He then finds a beautiful sight ahead: a benefit concert (led by Greg) to raise money to save the school. Many people gave a lot of money, just enough to save the school. Old Man and Ms. Langtree are happy, so happy that she just had to mention that damned Jimmy Brown and the stupid-ass gorilla again. But not for long, as coming from behind is the stupid-ass GORILLA!! After scaring everyone (again), OML asks Wirt to do something and Wirt complies, but his untied shoes make everything...better. Because of them, he trips into and knocks over the gorilla, and his head falls off, revealing a man inside. It's Jimmy Brown, the man who left Ms. Langtree. He reveals the reason for the gorilla fiasco: he took a job in the circus as the gorilla to make enough money to buy a wedding ring for her (Aww, how sweet), but he can't get the head off and tries to get people to help him, but they run off because of its scary stature. Ms. Langtree is delighted and they reconcile. And Old Man Langtree is smiling and teary-eyed that things in the world are for the better after all. This chapter ends with Greg giving a reprise of "Potatoes and Molasses" and everyone is all smiles...and Wirt has to tie his shoe again.

Well, this half of this half hour was both happy and sad.
The sad part with the schoolhouse closing and Ms. Langtree's man leaving her...for whatever reason that was later revealed to be him getting a job to buy a ring for her. There's no way you can feel sorry for the Langtrees at this point. Fortunately, the main three happened to be around at the time. And throughout the circumstances that led up to the concert, there's no way I would keep from crying a little throughout the ep. But the antics of Greg did keep me from making a fool of myself with his antics with his friends and his song "Potatoes and Molasses". And the benefit concert really made me smile wide. If there anything Greg can't do, it's stopping to help anyone in need and failing helping anyone in need. And being his wonderful cheerful self, of course.

And with Chapter 3 ending, we jump into...

Our three heroes are in a truck hidden in hay, trying to on course. But the driver is going very fast to run away from the Beast. Because of the fast speed and rocky turn off a corner, they fall off the truck and into the rainy night, where they still up lost.

To their luck, they come across a tavern, and go inside. While Greg gets food, Wirt and Beatrice try to ask for directions to Adelaide but Bea gets repeatedly hit with a broom by a female employee, and leaves in anger, leaving Wirt with this unfortunate task.
The lady introduces herself as the Tavern Keeper (her real name is not revealed), and the other employees of the Tavern (it's unknown whether they work there or not [or that they also have real names either], so let's assume they do), Butcher, Baker, Midwife, Master and Apprentice, Tailor and Highwayman.

Wirt tries to ask for directions to some of them, but his inability to do (he stutters and says the wrong words the whole time) fails miserably, especially when he asks an old, mustachioed man for them (the man mistakes his cry for help for trouble in trying to marry a girl at a young age), so he instead gets a song on how to pop the question in stylish and extravagant fashion.

Meanwhile, Bea talks with a horse about her problem, but then wonders what person would She tries hard to find to also find directions, and hears a voice in the background, so she goes to the person to ask. Back inside, Wirt tells everyone he's isn't getting married, but no one's listening. They force him to a love song (since that's what everyone does there), and he tries to decline, but fails and sings his on-the-spot song. It's not about love, but is very personal. It reveals that Wirt and Greg are step-brothers with Greg being born after Wirt's mother remarried, they are lost and looking for a woman named Adelaide to find their way home. The employees finally understand what he was trying to say (with Master believing that he's a Pilgram) and help him out. Tavern Keeper then tells him a story (a song) about the Beast and tells Wirt to be careful.

Wirt looks for Beatrice and finds her missing. He grabs Greg (and a lantern) and they ride the horse to find her, and run into the Woodsman (who he thinks is the Beast), who has knocked out Beatrice, and warns them to stay away from the woods. Wirt fights back with some really quick thinking. He blows out his lantern and grabs the Woodsman, while Greg picks up Beatrice, and knocks off Woodsman's lantern, setting a tree on fire in the process. The three then flee from the scene, leaving Woodsman to salvage his lantern.

The real Beast then appears to tell Woodsman about his horrible plan: He must keep his lantern lit at all times, for the rest of his days, or his young daughter's life and soul will be in great danger upon the hands of Beast. He also wants Wirt and Greg, but Woodsman tells him to leave them alone.

Well, this was a darker one. But weren't the tavern employees great? Even if some didn't talk much and appear for a few seconds, they still were great. Whether together or individually:
-Tavern Keeper is deliciously wicked
-Butcher is
-Baker is enjoyably manic
-Midwife out of it (she spits out a fish upon her introduction), but that makes her great
-Master is amazingly stoic
-Tailor is wonderfully shy and woeful, and
-Highwayman is really scary
and yet these characters are absolutely great in their short appearances.

Also, I think Wirt needs to applauded here. He actually steps in and does a brave and heroic deed in saving Beatrice from the Woodsman's hands. Plus he rode a horse, despite not knowing hot to do so, and used quick thinking to stop the Woodsman from doing even worse to her. And they went away just as quick as they came. Wirt is awesome!

And my God, the Beast is scary (obviously).

Random Thoughts:
Chapter 3:
--How odd is it that Wirt has shoestrings on his shoes, despite that it looks like otherwise all the time?
--Beatrice is a mean old bossy boots. Her being a witch to Wirt just hurts. Wirt's comebacks to her were delicious. Also her little curse was really cute.
--I kinda figured the teacher is odd just from her first words. Her hair is nice, though.
--Her song, "Langtree's Lament" is very pleasant to hear. Greg's song, "Potatoes and Molasses", is this up to 12, with cuteness on severe.
--Skinny guys can be menacing in very large coats.
Chapter 4:
--Wirt just can be ignored...and that's sad.
--Beatrice got hit by a broom lady. That's refreshing.
--Somehow, I feel disappointed if the doesn't return.
--Beatrice just can't go five minutes without leaving Wirt and Greg behind. Maybe she wants maggots. (No she doesn't).
--Wirt and Greg are stepbrothers. Forget Dipper and Mabel, maybe they're like Phineas and Ferb.
--Who knew Wirt's shoes can slip off so easily? Even though they have shoestrings...as shown earlier. Logic...
--Watching the fire-burning tree confirmed my thought that everyone had shivers sent at that moment.
General:
I will say these Chapters are more funny and lighthearted than dark and scary, like the last two. But this is a good thing. I really enjoyed them and laughed out loud from, especially from Greg's continued antics. This will be a much more amazing experience as time goes on. See you tomorrow for my review of Chapters 5 & 6, Mad Love & Lullaby in Frogland.

Over The Garden Wall Review: The Old Grist Mill & Hard Times at the Huskin' Bee

Hi, everyone.
Welcome to the first review of Over The Garden Wall, the series that everyone has been waiting for, talking about and excited about for months. Days on end And now, it's finally come. And it was how I expected it to be: beautifully animated, wonderfully crafted, very well cast and just near perfect.
Now my reviews are different from those of the TV show websites, but you already knew that because of the name.

We start off the series in Chapter 1: The Old Grist Mill

with the announcer teaching us about the Unknown, a mysterious part of the forest that involve very scary faces that lurk in the shadows. This is where brothers Wirt and Gregory come in. They're lost, and want to find their way back home. Wirt is afraid of what may come from behind and Greg is busy saying random words that may be the name of his pet frog. We also meet Beatrice, a talking bird and the Woodsman, a man who works and lives in an old mill.

The Woodsman offers the brothers a place to stay for a while before they find the way back. Greg goes outside and lays out a candy trail. Then a wolf...thing--runs out of the forest and eats the trail, putting the brothers in danger, forcing the two to face off against it, with Beatrice barely to be seen. That really begins a development in Wirt in facing his fears head-on and taking them head on, which was awesome. After its defeat, the wolf ends up in the gears of the mill, with the mill destroyed, and somehow turns into a dog. Angry at the brothers' (unintenitonal) destruction, Woodsman gives them...directions. And after apologizing, Wirt and Greg set off on their way home...or are they?

So it leaves a few questions: What will Wirt and Greg head into next? Will Beatrice act like a traitor again? Will the Woodsman's words make any sense?


Well, we'll answer that as we reach Chapter 2: Hard Times at the Huskin' Bee.

Here, the Brothers (well, whatever last name Wirt & Greg have) continue their journey in the morning sun. As it turns out, Woodsman gave them the wrong directions (intentionally). They and Beatrice (who was saved by Greg from a thorned bush she was caught in) travel to a town called Pottsfield, a town inhabited by people who happen to wear costumes shaped like pumpkins. Wirt tries to ask for a way home, until misunderstandings lead to him & Greg being ganged up by townspeople, with a mysterious shadowy man, Enoch, coming from behind to scare them even more. He threatens to arrest them for crimes he thought they committed. This guy is threatening and fearful, but the sentence he lays on the brothers lessen the fear (well, at least mine, but I wouldn't put down my shield just yet). Later, the Three are working in a field harvesting pumpkins, saving corn, digging their graves, warding off crows--wait, DIGGING THEIR GRAVES?!?! Holy crap!! Then a skeleton becomes sentient and distracts the residents and gives the three time to escape (well, except Wirt, who stands by and watches the bag of bones dance in astonishment). Then oddly, Pumpkin Pennywise just decides to let Wirt go, because that skeleton, was another resident. Yes, the people of Pottsfield are skeletons. And the pumpkin costumes? Their skin. Okay, I'm really creeped out (which is odd because I get creeped out a lot). So, Wirt, Greg, and Beatrice continue their path to home...and where ever Beatrice has to go back.

The first chapters establish the four characters well. Wirt is a normal young man with a love of poetry, unknowing of his surroundings and looks out for his little brother. Greg is a happy-go-lucky kid with a big imagination, goofy (but cute) disposition and is just so sweet, you'll get a diabetes shock just by looking at him. Beatrice is an indifferent bird who kinda likes Greg, but could care less about Wirt, but is there to help, although she might have something hiding, and the Woodsman seemed to be a big scary man, until it's revealed that he's actually a helpful, resilient and resourceful guy willing to help the brothers out in the desperate time of need...at first.

And now some Random Thoughts about the first two episodes:
Chapter 1:
--Wirt is really doing well convincing himself how damning it is that a bird was just talking to him.
--Who else was close to pooping their pants when they saw the wolf? Just like Wirt was close to doing so when convincing Woodsman he and Greg are lost.
--The Woodsman is very different from other other roles Christopher Lloyd has voiced/played. Woodsman is no Doc Brown or The Hacker. Reallu.
--I definitely see some resemblances of Wirt and Greg in two other characters.

--Now, during the scene where Greg falls into the barrel, we see the mean, nasty, foaming wolf...and dear God, did it ever leave an impression on me in scaring me...and appearing in my nightmares.

Chapter 2
--That face Wirt made.

--Greg's shock at Bea's hatred of waffles (and not at that she eats maggots) is just cute as hell.
--The Pumpkin People are creepy. Wirt may have been right in that they are a cult.
--Wirt's poetry is beautiful.
--I may have mentioned this before, but I just love "Patient is the Night". That song is 90 seconds of music heaven. It's Chris Isaak's fault I have it illegally downloaded on every electronic device I own.
--Never enjoy a moment when a whole group of townspeople appears out of nowhere, especially when they prepare for your death.
--Even if someone doesn't like you, take their words for granted. It'll help.

In General
--Some female fans are already drawing up some freaky fanfic of Wirt right now. I wouldn't blame them if he wasn't a child, but we already have an example of otherwise.

--I didn't have very high hope for the series, but it was just enough to love it before I even saw a glimpse of it at New York Comic-Com. The animation is a mash of Adventure Time and Gravity Falls; the characters are very well-likable (especially Greg with his sweet, kind, goofy self and yes, I like even Beatrice, for all her...faults.

I so cannot wait for Chapters 3 & 4 tomorrow! Even though it's only less than a day away, I feel like it's forever. Oh well. thank you for joining me in the first OTGW review, and I hope to see you tomorrow for the second review with Chapters 3 Schooltown Follies) and 4 (Songs of the Dark Lantern. Good night!

Surprise SLMR: Rude

Hey, you guys never thought another SLMR would come, right? Wrong, here it is. It's "Rude" by MAGIC(Explanationpoint).

Now, I know this song has been reviewed to death by other people, but I want to give it my spin because since I heard it, I began a love/hate relationship with it. Here are the lyrcs to prove it.

"Saturday Mornin'/Jumped outta bed/ And put on my best suit"
"Got in my car/ And raced like a jet (jet, jet)/ All the way to you"
--Well, I hope your love for this girl is worth speeding across town and potential jail time, but moving on...
"Got out the car/And heart in my hand/To ask you a question"
Aww, he's gonna pop the question!! How sweet.
"Cause I know that yoouu're/An old-fashioned man (yeah)"
Oh. So you're gay? And the old guy's gay too. How...quaint. But I applaud MAGIC(exclamationpoint) for doing a pro-LGBT song for-
"Can I have your daughter for the rest of my life?"
Oh his daughter! Okay, makes more sense and--makes me look like a homophobe...
"Say yes, say yes, cause I need to know"
"He said, 'You'll never get ya blessing till the day I die/
Tough luck, my friend, but the answer is NO!'"
Ouch. Shot down. Oh, well. I would assume the rest of the song is about the heartbreak the dude suffers after that and a breakup with the girl--
"Why you gotta be so Ruuude?/Don't you know I'm human too?"
What.
"Why you gotta be so ruuude?/I'm gonna marry her anyway!"
Really?! Is the dude such a baby that when anyone take something away from him for a legitimate reason, he'll cry and call them rude? Wow, what a man-bitch. Wow, what a mitch.
The dad shot you down. He doesn't want you to marry his daughter. And he has reasons for that. Maybe you're a convicted felon. Maybe you're an illegal alien in desperate need of a green card. And your take-away from this is that he's rude?! Just because you're human, doesn't mean you can get anything you want. And the dad loves his daughter enough not to give her away to any man, especially a man like you! Or maybe it was the "best suit" you wore in the music video.

Ugh, that shirt. So 2009.

Anyway, he gets shut down two more times during the song, but apparently, he just doesn't get the point: The dad doesn't like him, and doesn't want him to marry his daughter. But he doesn't fuckin' care; he just wants to put a bad rift between a family by taking the daughter and takes her away from her parents, I do feel sorry for the parents. Even though the story stops at they running away to elopement, I hope they end up in a screwed-up marriage and that the parents cut her off until she comes to her senses and leave--
This is the part where I cut myself off and show another part of the song--
"Why you gotta so ru-ude"
Oh that's it? Okay. Anyway, to be honest, I find this song catchy, but the lyrics are horrible. There is no way anyone is going to like them and side with the guy. So what if he has undying love for the girl? He went against the word of her father, and defiantly marries her, and the girl went behind her father's back and runs off with the guy, destroying her family's strong bond in the process. I love the beat, which is a perfect authentic Reggae beat, but the lyrics laid over it are horrendous. I hope MAGIC! makes another song that doesn't portray the front-man as a defiant asshole,k because if I hear it and it happens, I will condemn them till kingdom come. Good luck, MAGIC!. You have till the next single.

See you guys...well, later.

Andrew This Week: The Walk From Hell & They Guy Who Saved My Life

Hi, everyone. I'm Andrew and I a question: Have you ever had a bad day so bad, you have nothing to think but that it couldn't get any worse, but it does? Well, it happened to me yesterday, and as soon as I tell it too you (well, at least the first part), I wanna forget it for an eternity. But there is a silver living to all this, and it really wasn't all bad from there. And I'm entirely grateful to one guy who helped me out in a major and amazing way...If only I knew his name. Anyway, let's start at the beginning.

Every year in Philadelphia, there is a televised parade held on Thanksgiving. I signed up as a volunteer to handle a giant balloon with a bunch of other people. On the morning the first of November, the balloon handlers went to the studios of WPVI-6abc to begin training for the big day. On top of freezing-cold temperature and winds, it was raining. Bad. I had $13 in tow and some change, some of it for a SEPTA ride home (SEPTA is the transportation company that operates in Southern Pennsylvania.) Before I could begin training, I went to the Target across the street to buy a cup of coffee. They has a Starbucks there, and the prices were expensive of course, so I bought the cheapest cup they could sell. It was $3.19, with tax. It did taste good though. Anyway, me and the group of people I was signed up with (it was looong line) carried our practice balloon across part of the parking lot and it went by smoothly, and as this was my third year as balloon handler, I said so with pride and joy.

After the training ended, I went to the nearby Potbelly for lunch. I ordered an Original Grilled Chicken and Cheddar sandwich. The employee asked me if I wanted some Bacon on it too, and I said yes. (I may wanna mention that I asked if that'll cost extra and she said yes. And I said yes to the extra bacon) So I went to pay for my meal, and it came up to $8.16. I was shocked, because I barely had enough money for carfare. But i bought it anyway. (Hindsight Facepalm) (You may call me an idiot, stupid, dumbass or an even worse name in the comments section, on Facebook and on Twitter too) After eating my meal (which was admittingly delicious), I though long and hard about what I had to do next. so I walked across the lot where Potbelly was at on City. Then I walked across a bridge (a scary one, too) and walked on the other side. And from there I began what I would call for the rest of my life THE WALK FROM HELL. I though this day would go bad, but it didn't; it got worse.

I walked all the way down Monument Road, which was part of the 65 bus route, and watched cars go by like Soulja Boy's (who?) career. I feared the freezing cold temps, hard falling rain and cars driving with water spill at me would bring me down, but nope, I kept on truckin'. It was a very long walk on a very long day. I thought I'd die on the street, but it wasn't gonna be a possibility for me. I walked past the studios of 6ABC and NBC10, two shopping centers, three bridges, all the way across the campus of Saint Joseph's University and a large field. (Feel free to use Google Maps to document my journey yourself, it's quite jarring.)

After this, I had reached a virtual dead end. I stopped near a hospital in Montgomery County and looked for the next route stop sign; I couldn't find it, thinking I took the wrong turn). That's when my day went from worse to slightly bad. I saw this guy at this house doing outdoor yard work for a family (I didn't know what) with a red Ford F-150 Chasis Cab like this one
as his vehicle of choice. With not many options left, I asked him where the Transportation Center was; he didn't have a clue so he looked at his phone, to no luck because of the hard rain. I then told him about my situation (sans the sandwich and the evil bacon extra) and was desperate to get back home. He later gave me an option: to wait for him while he finishes his work and give me a ride home or take his directions and walk all the way home. It was obvious I made the right choice and did the former. He had 45 minutes of work quota left and let me sit in his truck for the time being. Unfortunately, his heating system didn't work, so I had to sit out 3 quarters of an hour freezing and shivering in pain. (But hey, I'd rather take that, and a ride home, than walk all the way home from freaking 6abc HQ in the rain with all my clothes wet and the risk of catching pneumonia).

So finally, after all his work was done, the guy and I began our long trek taking me home. To be honest, I had reservations about this guy; I had a few thoughts that he could be a rapist or child molestor or serial killer; but as you keep reading, you'll all read along with me that this is definitely not the case. As we rode down along the streets of Upper Darby, I find out that, had I chose to keep on walking, it would've taken me literally all day to get back home. And speaking of that, me and mystery yard-work driver were talking about this situation. He said that it would've taken me a "minute" to get get back to my house (a minute, of course, being a slang term for "a long time"), and I replied that it would've taken me "literally more than a minute", and we both laughed like kids. He then told me that I looked familiar, and he asked me if I knew some people like Black and CJ. I said no and that the only CJ I knew was from Tyler Perry's House of Payne.

So after a long ride, the guy told me he would drop me off at the local CVS so that he could replace the work trailer in the back of his truck with his cart (that and he has a wife and kids; he didn't want them to know about me, and I don't blame him). And there's when even more good deed come in. He actually not only dropped me off someplace to do something really quick, he also didn't leave me there and forget about me like an asshole dipshit parent leaves their child and abandons them. He actually came back for me! That is one sweet guy. After that we finally reached the home stretch (actually its just an elementary school I used to go to; it's down the street from my house). I thanked him for driving me back (near) home, and wished him Happy Holidays. This man gave up some of his time to help a stranger out and drive him home. I am forever grateful for a truly good deed and indebted to him.
Also, I'm never spending more money for extra anything on any fast-food item I'm eating ever again. After such a horrible day involving walking across part of an entire city, I don't think I'll ever like walking for a long time.

Guy, whoever you are, Thank you.

CN Introduces First Gay Kids Cartoon Characters...and it may have censored their kiss, too

Happy Halloween, everyone.
Seen this yesterday?

You likely may have because the story behind it blew up across the Internet. Cartoon Network introduced the first-ever pair of openly gay male characters in a children's cartoon series in an episode of its series Clarence. Now you may be wondering what the show is. Well, you may have never heard of it before video featuring the two was released to YouTube...or before you read this blog.

In the video, which is an except from the episode "Neighborhood Grill", a guy walks into a restaurant and looks for his date. He looks at a woman and she looks back (she's on a blind date, I assume; I haven't watched the episode yet). The guy shakes his head no, and ask the employee. Then another guy walk to the guy. They smile at each other, give each other a kiss on the cheek, and walk away arms-in-sides, ready for their date. Here it is below.

Aww, how sweet.

Since then, it got everyone talking, and a big discussion was made: Is it now possible for cartoons to allow gay characters to interact on shows like this? Well, I say yes. As long as they don't do any PDA (public displays of affection) like the one we saw in that clip and the producers, writers and VAs steer clear of the many annoying stereotypes we've seen on TV for the past few decades. Lord knows we don't need a Pride parade on an ep of Regular Show or a character shaped like a rainbow on Gumball or Uncle Grandpa revealing he's gay but likes sleeping with chicks so much, that he doesn't mind the worldwide breed of nieces and nephews/grandsons and granddaughters he has.

In my opinion, I don't find it a big deal, but I think it was handled very well. It was kinda low-key: neither of the men said anything, they didn't kiss on the mouth, and they walked off arm-in-side. It wasn't a "very-special-episode" type of thing, and it was really nice.

I also want to talk about how the media is focusing on CN "censoring" the kiss in their online articles. I got really annoyed when the articles I looked at, took an angle in which it sounds like CN did a bad thing by making Clarence producers make a scene showing two guys kiss on the cheek, instead of on the lips, to garner clicks and views. It's really not. In fact, it's clear that the execs supported this, but wanted the kiss to be toned down, and it's very obvious why its execs did it. It's a kids show, meaning mostly kids watch it. Showing two guys kissing will disgust the kids watching, and they'll tell their parents about it; then they'll be pissed and bombard the network's SoMed pages, and the television censoring groups will be up-in-arms, command CN to cancel Clarence and want it to disband. CN didn't censor the kiss to ruin the content or whatever idea the producers had to make a point. For the reason I've already explained, I want to just look at an article the way it should be: Cartoon Network Introduces First Openly-Gay Characters in Children's Cartoons.

I'm very proud of Cartoon Network for making the bold move of having an openly-gay couple on one of its shows. It really says that cartoons have become more open to more taboo things that have previously kept as taboos a few years ago. We've already have death, violence, words like "pissed" and "crap" being uttered and even male characters back cracks shown (including on this show). So it was a matter of time before this would finally be addressed.

But to be more honest, I don't care about the censored kiss in that sense or the big blow-up about the two gay men kissing. No. I'm more interested in those suits they were wearing!

Talk about dapper.
Anyway, I wish all of you a Happy Halloween, and I'll see you guys next month for...some things I may have planned.

#1SW: Brothers

(This one's a little shorter than usual, but meh)


Oh boy, do I remember this show. And boy, was it terrible. Michael Strahan is in it...and it didn't really help. It's "Brothers".

Brothers stars NFL superstar-turned-actor-turned-Fox NFL Sunday analyst/Live with Kelly & Michael co-host Michael Strahan as Michael Trainor, a retired NFL player, and Daryl "Chill" Mitchell as his brother "Chill" Mitchell, a paraplegic (this after a car crash) who runs a restaurant. CCH Pounder & Carl Weathers also star as their parents Adele and "Coach". The plot is both brothers trying to bond after Mike moves to

In hindsight (because I was 15 in 2009 and didn't know enough and cared for what happens behind-the-scenes in television), I thought this was a complete waste of talent for all four actors, especially CCH and Carl. These two have been in the TV business for a long time, so to see them in this show was a big slap in the face for them and their fans.
I didn't care for Michael that much, as I think he's more of a guest-star type actor, and he's really damn good in his roles on Fox NFL Sunday and Live!, so my perception oh him changed a lot. But this isn't that show for him. Same thing for Chill; he's also a pretty good actor.
One of their weirder episodes was about one of their neighbers giving the dad a cookie jar shaped like a Mammy (or old black woman working as a housekeeper to a white family in the 1930s) and had lemon bars in it. This was one of those "two male neighbors who don't get along but are forced by their wives to bond for some reason involving them" plots that annoying, unfunny and cringing in sitcoms. The worst is in

I don't know why Fox execs at the time picked this show up in the first place, or what they saw in it. This is terrible, most jokes don't land well, the episode plots really never hold up, the humor is barely there and . The characters were likable enough to keep the show going, but it just that doesn't carry the whole thing.
I may have had interest in this when it first aired, but there's not much left anymore.
I'm glad the cast has other shows/interests in their careers to do now.

No episodes are available on YT and you'd be lucky to purchase it on iTunes.

Tune in next month for a slightly better edition with a much better and deserves-more-than-one-season choice than this. I hope to God you love it. See you next month!!

SLMR: Out of the Woods

Welcome to Short/Long Music Review, where I find songs (I either love or hate) to review them in a short review that took a long time to review.

Taylor Swift is on the road to another album, and we're on the road to mocking her again.

Now a little about her last single, "Shake It Off"? I actually liked it. (What?) It's a fun upbeat song with catchy lyrics and great beat to dance to. Even though the lyrics are corny, especially the spoken word and rap verses in the bridge, I really liked it. (Does anyone else feel a little chilly)
Anyway, after this, Taylor has released another single from her latest album 1989, and this one's called "Out of the Woods". And from what I hear, it's about running away from reality and into a wonderful fantasy into a forest of happiness and freedom from people--Oh, who am I kidding? It's another song about another shitty relationship she clearly didn't put much thought or effort into. Let's get this over with, shall we?

But first, here's the Backstory: the "One More Reason I Can't Get Any Soon" victim/Boyfriend for this song is One Direction member Harry Styles, who dated Taylor last year. Now, let's see Taylor give us her take of the 20th failed relationship she's been in since becoming famous.

Little Boys Fight While Parents Cheer On--SMGDH

This is just sick and wrong.

A video was released earlier today, showing two little boys fighting in Wilmington, Del. What makes this worse is that the their parents and the other adults in the video aren't stopping them. They're letting them fight, and even cheered them on. At one point, you can hear the boys cry. Take a look at the video below, courtesy of WPVI Philadelphia.

The video was posted to the station's Facebook page by a viewer with the viewer asking for a follow up, and the station complied. Wilmington police are investigating. It is unknown why the boys are fighting, but nonetheless, this is disturbing.

Parents, adults, you people are idiots.
If your children are in a conflict, you don't settle it by forcing to fight! That not only doesn't deserve to happen, but it shows how inhumane and downright horrible parents can be. I know there are people saying "Don't judge them; they're doing what they think is right". And that's...okay. But if what they think is right includes two elementary-school-aged kids beating the snot out of each other, then they all need a night in jail--the parents for the fight and the kids to be taught a lesson that violence is the wrong answer. Oh and those people; I seriously question their logic and sanity.

Snoop Dogg vs. Iggy Azalea: The Pic from Insta-Hell

Hey, guys.

Iggy Azalea is not impressed.
The Australian hip-hop superstar has gone into a tizzy with rap legend Snoop Dogg over a strange picture that's gone viral all over social media.

This picture of an albino woman with the caption "Iggy Azalea No Makeup" was released on Snoop's Instagram account on Wednesday. Soon after the laughs and mocks came in, Iggy responded in a not-too-pleased manner with these tweets

She's right. It's not funny to me. I've seen pictures of Iggy without makeup before, and she still looks hot. So I don't know why people are saying it's just harmless, when
1) It's not
2) Iggy and Snoop were on good terms before and
3) If he had shown this to Iggy first before the world, maybe then it would've been harmless.

Also, I don't think this is funny for another reason: that's some other woman in that photo. Imagine how shocked, scared and humiliated she will be after she realized that people all over the world or laughing at her because of the indirect "joke" that Mr. Dogg unleashed (pun maybe intended) unto the Web. I'd feel very sorry for her. And people (mostly black anyway) say this is a harmless joke.

Also, on a side note: If Iggy sent a pic of Snoop without makeup, it would make no sense...because outside of TV and movies and Music videos, men don't wear makeup (well, at least straight men don't). Although that's a blessing if so because no one wants to fathom even the very thought of Snoop Dogg without makeup.

And the caption "Iggy Azalea No Makeup" makes me craxk up. Messed up grammar makes me die of laughter.

GamerGate 2014: My Weak Gamer-Boy Thoughts

I haven't heard much about the Gamergate scandal, but what I read featured people threatening to kill others because they have differing opinions or don't like a certain game someone else does. This got me angry and decided to speak out a little about Gamergate in general.

*-It you have an opinion on something, either say it or, if you don't want to say something in fear of being ostracized, keep it to yourself.
*-DO NOT, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD AND ALL THINGS SANE, THREATEN TO KILL ANYONE. That is fucking sick, horrible and downright nauseating. It's one thing to disagree with someone over even the most obscure things in gaming, but saying "I will kill you" of any variation to anyone is not okay.
*-Snapping at women for having a place in gaming, just because they have tits and a vagina is extremely sexist and makes you all like disgusting horny idiots. It's just like The Fappening, except pictures are replaced with words, and it's just as cruel and demeaning. But this time, no woman is at fault; they're just doing their jobs and do not deserve what has been coming to them.
*-The men who made this happen needs a good kick in the ass and message on how to make an intelligent conversation on gaming and what to do in it. If the second thing doesn't work, they need another good kick in the ass and a really good kick in the nuts. This is a damn shame and an embarrassment, not only to the video game industry, but also to mankind as well.
*-This entire Gamergate thing has gotten out of control and needs to stop. Not soon, but now. We already have bigger shit to deal with in this world, and this should not be another.

7th Heaven Star Shockingly Revealed to Be a Sexual Predator

Here's something I never saw coming.

A star of 7th Heaven, one of the most wholesome, family-friendly shows of the 90s and 00s, revealed to have sexually abused a girl and exposing himself to two others years ago.

Stephen Collins, who played father and reverend Eric Camden on the legendary family drama, revealed in an audio recording obtained and released by TMZ, that he sexually assaulted a 10-year-old girl sometime in 2012 and also flashed two other young girls at that time.
He revealed the shocking deeds to his now ex-wife Faye Grant, who secretly recorded the confession during a therapy session the couple had two years ago.

Here's the audio below:


Of course, this news blew up on social media, but an added depth of surprise and creepiness was added because this actor played a goddamn pastor on a family drama. Here are some of the responses from loyal fans of the show, some of which as actually funny:

The Stephen Collins news is absolutely horrifying.

— Vince O. (@VinceNotVance) October 7, 2014

It takes a lot to shock me, but the molestation allegations involving the 7th Heaven dad made my jaw drop. http://t.co/LsOeG5k3Ei

— Steve Helling (@stevehelling) October 7, 2014

More like "7th Grade Heaven." #amirite http://t.co/6c8TlxK2FK pic.twitter.com/HYB1gCKBhh

— Mentality Mag (@MentalityMag) October 7, 2014

why did you have to ruin my childhood @StephenCollins

— SHUTUP BILL (@suchathrillaaa) October 7, 2014

Stephen Collins, you're killing me. You're really killing me.

— Kameo Bingham (@Kameo_12) October 7, 2014

Can we just talk about Rev. Camden for a second?! WTF, Stephen Collins! I can't deal! 😳 #childhoodruined #7thHeaven

— Hazel Aguilon RX93.1 (@hazelhottie) October 7, 2014

(and a response)

@hazelhottie As in WTF?!?! What would Rev. Eric Camden say to Stephen Collins?!?!?!

— woshiabi (@AbiYuson) October 7, 2014

This is a damn shame. An actor well-known as playing a reverend, a man of God, on a wholesome family drama--doing such a disgusting thing. This just really took me (and everyone else across the country) by surprise. Take away his TV character, and it's still the same. This is definitely below him (or anyone for that matter), and I definitely lost all respect for him after this.

Tweeter in My Mouth with Donald Trump

Hey, everyone. Sucks to be Donald Trump. Right?

Earlier this week, the world-famous billionaire was looked upon a tweet by a follower (named "@Feckhead) who wanted him (and his followers) to recognize the legacy of his parents, who "died". Here's the tweet:

Hi @realDonaldTrump. My parents who passed away always said you were big inspiration.Can you pls RT for their memory? pic.twitter.com/veBxFNXnOd

— Philip Bradbury (@feckhead) September 29, 2014

Soon after reading this, Trump retweeted the tweet to his followers around the world, sending him love and respect, and the guy ended up happy and in tears of joy...or so we thought.

But here's what he (to his later horror) and the rest of America (to our amusement) didn't know about @Feckhead's "parents". As it turns out, they are Fred and Rose West, a notorious husband and wife team of--get this--MURDERERS from the UK.

After this screw-up, the Great British public were understandably furious. But...instead of tweeting back at Mr. Trump in a furor, they tweeted humorous tweets asking him to honor their "parents", and tied them to some of the most infamous and horrible people in the history of mankind. Whether real or fictional...or maybe even non-sentient.

Some of said tweets include:
Adolf Hitler

.@realDonaldTrump My grandad loved you. He's dead now (we think) RT? pic.twitter.com/y8fDV5bOAT

— Jake Lambert (@LittleLostLad) September 29, 2014

Darth Vader

.@realDonaldTrump My Dad sadly died after being struck by lightning but saw you as a role model - pls RT as tribute? pic.twitter.com/Z6xyOezXzn

— John Nugent (@mr_nugent) September 29, 2014

The Alien from Alien

Hi @realDonaldTrump. My parents who passed away always said you were a big inspiration. Can you RT for their memory? pic.twitter.com/pVUWt5a42Y

— JamieDMJ (@JamieDMJ) September 29, 2014

Freddy Kruger

Please retweet for my brother who has a disfiguring skin condition @realDonaldTrump pic.twitter.com/gBQPLARgqh

— Beaker Police (@OffencePolice) September 29, 2014

A bird

Hello @realDonaldTrump, my son has a disfiguring condition that leaves him like this. Can you RT to raise awareness? pic.twitter.com/tkLrNSSMzq

— TechnicallyRon (@TechnicallyRon) September 29, 2014

Nemo

Hi @realDonaldTrump. My fish has gone missing. Could you RT to help find him? pic.twitter.com/0d97CrvFEM

— Margo Milne (@MargoJMilne) September 29, 2014

a vibrator

Hi @realDonaldTrump, my rabbit has died and now I'm really sad. Please RT pic.twitter.com/3xfjglvXMN

— Gallers (@Donna_Gallers) September 29, 2014

and even Trump himself.

Hi @realDonaldTrump, could you RT this picture of my uncle, he's losing his mind a bit. He's always been fond of you. pic.twitter.com/2kBYDpRWfF

— Steven Smith (@Standard_Steven) September 29, 2014

This seriously reminds of that So-Med campaign by the NYPD earlier this year that epically failed overnight. Same execution, different punch bag.

Okay, even though I don't blame Trump for doing a nice thing like sending support for a random unknown, I really don't understand why anyone would retweet something in this manner from someone with a handle like "@Fechhead".

As much as it is killing me in the laugh department, it's not the worst thing Trump has went through. Nope. At least not yet.