Wednesday, March 08, 2017

Rock Band Member Administered an Enema on Himself During A Charity Concert... It Gets Worse from There. (EW.)

Wow, he looks like he's tripping on acid.
And she looks like Melania on meth.

I hope you've either not eaten yet or have already finished.
Because this last post today is kinda gross.
Apologies in advance.

Remember Murphy's Law: anything that can go wrong will go wrong?
Well, that happened late last month when performance-art band Sonic Rabbit Hole played at a charity event for a cancer patient at a local Houston bar called AvantGarden, and it's front-man Michael Clemmons is at fart--I mean, fault.
One of the most unexpected things at the event that you really wouldn't expect when during a song,  Clemmons dropped his pants and administered, by what he claims, a protein shake enema--all by himself--right in front of the bar's staff and customers. (EWWWW...)

But wait, there's more.
As this story continues, it gets worse (and smellier) from there. After Clemmons finished the enema--oh wait, I'm sorry; attempted the enema, he suddenly unleashed a shitstorm on everyone inside. LITERALLY.
He crapped all over the stage. It was as horrifying nasty as you would expect.

Dude...lemme tell you something. No one gives a flying fuck about your "art" (especially if features a self-administered enema)(and especially at a charity event)! When you're a member of a band, and you  have a gig that either pays you or doesn't, you job is to perform your music. Your art is second fiddle unless it's related to the song (and I have a feeling it doesn't).

Anyway, after the event abruptly ended, the AventGarden had to close early and all patrons and employees had to disperse (obviously because of the smell). And the cleanup and airing out of the foul smell had to have been a heavy task. And before the cleanup, I could only imagine how horrible it must have been for the owner and her employees to have to deal with the aftermath and affects of Clemmons using the stage as an outhouse for the rest of time. Unless they paid me well (along with tips), I would've quit immediately and later made fun of the event and Clemmons for the rest of my life.

The fact that Clemmons (who BTW looks like Jon Heder if stopped giving a crap about his career [I'm sure Pickle and Peanut will do that to a guy]) crap-blasted all over the bar stage was disgusting enough, but the thought that someone had to clean that all up is enough to make me (and you as you read this) gag something fierce. I feel so sorry for the person who had to clean up all that poop. This would scar and nauseate me for a long time.
Reading this goddamn story would scar me for a long time!

AvantGarden owner Marriana Lemesoff, along with Clemmons, went to Houston's KPRC Local 2 to reveal their sides of the story.
Clemmons denied he did the shitstorm (it's unbelievable).
Here's the video.

Wow, he looks like he's tripping on acid.
As the great Rick James once said, "Cocaine is a hell of a drug."
Man, stop lying. You clearly did do what you did. And the fact that you choose not to apologize for your failed attempt at art seriously pissed me off.
And it's the owner's word against yours. You deserve all the criticism for all that you done that night. And for that, Michael Clemmons, you will forever be known as "Enema McShitblaster".
If I were the owner, I would've sued him. I wouldn't give a shit if Enema did it for his "art"; sticking an enema drip up his ass at a bar (where people are drinking and even eating) is something they (or anyone for that matter) do not want to (or even think to) see.
They came to have a good time and enjoy themselves (especially in this case of donating to charity), and one thing they came for (and paid for) is to hear your sub-VH1 You Oughta Know band play your music, Mr. McShitblaster.
Not something you're only supposed to do at a fucking hospital!

I feel sorry for Ms. Lemesoff, the AvantGarden staff, the customers who appear at the event, the organizer of the cancer charity drive (whom now has to have people donate on GoFundMe) and even the other member of Sonic Rabbit Hole (who will probably be referred to by comic people as Sonic Ass-it Hole) to gone through that. But not "Enema McShitblaster".
But hey, they're famous now. I guess that's what matters...

--
Post based on articles from The Daily Mail , KPRC Local 2's Click2Houston and KTRK ABC13 Eyewitness News.

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