Kim Kardashian has been known as a reality show star, model, taken-black-man stealer and -- most of all things -- a sex tape goddess. But there's one thing she's never known for (but her family and supporters make you think it) -- working girl.
In a video interview for Variety, Kardashian had advice for those wanting to be as easily wealthy and fame-seeking -- I mean, hard-working and successful as she.
"I have the best advice for women in business. Get your fucking ass up and work. It seems like nobody wants to work these days."
Yeah, sure. Because you seem to be the beacon for women trudging through hours a day of hard, menial labor in America.
In the words of Lizzo from her song "Juice", bitch you lie. You have never worked a day in your life. And no, starring in a popular reality show, picking out clothes and fashion designs, going to red carpet events and appearing at awards shows is not considered work. You've been rich and privileged since the day you were born. You grew up around the rich and privileged. And have been even more rich and privileged ever since. Your father was the lawyer for O.J. Simpson, your mother is/was an entertainment manager, and your (now-ex) stepfather is an Olympic gold metal athlete.
And of course, you got even more rich and privileged (not to mention famous) after that tape where you got rammed raw by Ray J intentionally posted -- I meant leaked to the internet, causing you to have a reality show that somehow got more and more popular and the increasing notoriety and attention that even your sisters could never attain to! And speaking of your sisters, you can bet your bottom (and) dollar that they're grateful that they now have at least even a fraction of the attention that you have. To mooch of your much more famous sister to become a famous-for-being-famous leech on the teat of Tinsel Town of your own most definitely had been a dream come true for them. What with Kendall with her modeling, Kylie with her makeup line and ugly lip fillers, and getting drilled by both Tyga (while underage mind you) and Travis Scott (then having his child, while barely an adult) (plus their hosting the Much Music Video Awards), Kourtney... with whatever she's doing (I like that I don't know much about her), Khloe with her brief TV hosting gigs including U.S. X Factor and her dumb E! show Revenge Body, and mom Kris with her shitty, vapid short-lived talk show (which was the place where Kanye revealed his and Kim's first kid), it feels so good to do so much with/because of/thanks to so very little.
And speaking of grateful, in an interview with Oprah, you said that you regretted making the "Superstar", that you were not grateful of the success and attention you received from it and, that if you had the chance to live your life again, you wouldn't do it. Again I say, bitch you lie. Of course you would do it again, because how else would you get to where you are in the world of celebrity (reality show, fashion titan, red carpet magnet" marriage to Kanye West, the marriage stunt against Kris Humphries, appearances in movies and TV shows, and the fact that you'll still be relevant until the world collapses and we're all sent to hell for the unfathomable, inconceivable and unfortunate series of events that led to your conception, birth and life) without it? Without that One Night in Paris ripoff, you'd still be assisting and mooching off of celebrities who actually have talents and worked hard for their fame and fortune, desperately grasping for whatever time and place in the limelight you'll enjoy for the rest of your paltry, incredulous existence (if not mooching off your father good name as a defense attorney).
Kim, sit your fucking ass down. You are the very last person on Earth this moment in time to tell anybody (woman or man) to find gainful employment, when you yourself have never had gainful employment in your whole life that you applied for or for which you had major experience in the first place. Everything you've done that seemed like work was given to you on a silver platter (whether you've asked, paid for, begged and/or cried for [possibly in that very order]). Nothing you've done probably in your entire life suggests you've ever done the studies for or received a major achievement of education for (except probably your criminal justice work [and all you've maybe done was talk sweet nothings to Donald Trump; fortunately, Cyntoia Brown is a free woman]). And even if some can't or even won't get a job (like they're Tommy from Martin), they won't inject such sage, well-spoken wisdom into themselves from you. Your "words of encouragement" don't mean fuck all. And you and your klan mean fuck all -- to me and so many other people. So please, do the rest of the world a favor, and shut. the fuck. up.
Telling people far below your tax bracket to "get your fucking ass up and work" is a goddamn insult to people who actually do work -- whether they had difficult back-breaking work for decade, or just started; hell, even to people don't have one at all; it all just feels like a slap in the face to everyone. You never had a legit job in your life -- not even being a mother (and this extends to your family to a lesser extent up until "Superstar" was released, and after this interview, probably never will. Just do whatever the hell you've always done before and keep doing in until you die -- spend exorbitant amounts of money of frivolous, superfluous material possessions, multiple trips around the world and appearances at events (televised or non, but more so televised) where hundreds of cameras and idiotic zombie fans will devour your every move in whatever super-expensive and possibly-strenuous dress that the designer will no doubt get the high clout only seconds later, because everything you do or tell other people is insignificant to the fabric of life on this planet, despite what your family, your "friends", the tabloids, or any known publication tells us.
At least you're far away from Kanye. And say what you will about Pete Davidson; at least he worked hard to get a job.
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