Friday, May 31, 2013

Aber(crap)bie and Bitch

Hi everybody!

Today is the last day of the month of May. So Maroon May is come to a close, so I must produce a few last editions of opinion and crap before this blog goes back to normal.

So I want to talk about the recent news about Abercrombie & Fitch has been in hot water for trying to be a clothing store for stick-looking dickheads and cunts/cool and popular kids at your local high school and watering hole.
Its CEO, Mike Jeffries, made a comment to Salon magazine in 2006 talking about this saying "In every school there are the cool and popular kids, and then there are the not-so-cool kids. Candidly, we go after the cool kids. We go after the attractive all-American kid with a great attitude and a lot of friends. A lot of people don’t belong [in A&F], and they can’t belong. Are we exclusionary? Absolutely. … [C]ompanies that are in trouble are trying to target everybody: young, old, fat, skinny. But then you become totally vanilla. You don’t alienate anybody, but you don’t excite anybody, either.” Although A&F doesn't make clothes for plus-sized women anymore, the still will make clothes for plus-size men, probably because they need a reason to feel like Arnold Schwarzenegger, even though they look like Kevin James. Of course the sudden rediscovering of these comments have outraged the nation.

This crap about only skinny people shopping at high-end department stores is getting annoying to me. Especially now. There are people on this Earth that need to dress as good as much as they want to feel good too. Although there are ways that cannot--no, should not--do that, as seen on the Maury Show. To take away the right for plus-size women to look great on the way to the mall or the bar or the movies is really outrageous. To me, they're more than just weight and measurements. They're people. They have feelings like we do, self-esteem like we do, faces and bodies and breasts like we do. (Don't deny it.) They walk and talk and have reasons to live. A big amount of weight is just the +1. It's their choice to be this way. And for some jerkass CEO to make this plan to take L, XL, and XXL clothes makes me mad. You, Mike Jeffries, are a twat. There are more than just skinny, short, JJ Evans-looking Boys and girls or men and women (like me) who want to clearly show that off like they're rich hipsters with the irony of love on their arms. There are bigger people who want to feel that same way (without the hipster bullship). Now that you take that away, they'll have to shop elsewhere like H&M or Old Navy or Aeropostale or other places that large people for nice clothes that make them look 3 or 4 (or 6) sizes smaller. And they'll shop there for a very long time. As long as they have the money. I hope you're happy, Mike Jeffries, because that's less money in the company's bank and less credibility and respect and love from your family (if they're still noticing you without the merch on your employee discount) going toward you moving forward. So I hope Mark--oop---Mike What's-his-face changes or doesn't enforce this new idea into all the A&Fs or I won't shop in protest. Which is funny, because I rarely shop there at all.

Now what are your thoughts on this. Place them in the comments section. Don't forget to follow me on Twitter. See ya soon!

Monday, May 27, 2013

MM: Xbox One: My Weak Gamer-Boy Review

Hey guys. How's it going? I know you guys have been waiting for the newest Xbox to be revealed, so that you all can wait for my thoughts on this, right? No...well you're in luck, because I have now given you my complete deconstruction of the Xbox One and why it could (I repeat, could) change the face of computer gaming forever.



Now, Microsoft gave a press conference for the newest Xbox, The Xbox One (and not the Xbox 720 like everyone wanted), last Tuesday at its headquarters in Redmond, Washington. I'll admit that I didn't watch the the livestream that day because I didn't have my internet connection ready and when I saw the XBO for the first time, I was iffy on the design.

It looked like a mix of a cable box and a DVD player.
I did like the controller and Kinect more.
And also I didn't like some of the features it provided, mostly because all I heard was stuff about connecting to your cable box and the Kinect being bundled with it and nothing about its primary use: being a Gaming Console. I thought "This is stupid. I don't want to buy something for gaming that isn't gaming at all".
But a week later, when I watched the livestream courtesy of Machinima (shoutout to them by the way; Bruce and Kovic are hilarious), I learned a lot more about the XBO. A lot more that changed my mind and actually made me more exited to wait to get my hands on it. Never have I ever been so exited for something so huge and bulky and rectangular and big. Yes, I just noticed what I typed.

So here is the Xbox One is all about.
Now it's not only a gaming system, it's also a home-entertainment system. When you turn it on, instead of manually signing into into your Xbox account, it uses the Kinect to recognize your face and cosign it with the account. So when that happens, it just takes you to home base, problem free. If that's not the coolest thing, i don't know what is. Seriously, I'm not much of a gaming nut, so this is the coolest thing to me. Also cool is talking to your Xbox without using your controller. You just say a command, and the XBO does it in about a second. Just say "Xbox" and then your command, like "Xbox, game" or "Xbox, watch TV" or "Xbox, go to music". You don't have to say "Xbox" every time, but still.

That's just awesome. And just as awesome is the Snap feature; by using it, you can use more than one feature at once. Just say "Xbox, Snap (then a command)", Like "Snap Internet Explorer" or "Snap Favorites". You can also use your cellphone to connect with it. And if you want to go home, just make a grab motion at the Kinect, and you're already home.
When watching TV you can use your voice to check the guide, favorites, and what's trending. To The guide, say "guide". To change the channel, say a network or TV show's name. To Trending or "Favorites", say "Trending" or "Favorites'.

Now to a few things that I'm on the fence about. Now the TV experience thing may sound easy, but might be a bit confusing as time goes on. After a few uses, you probably might go back to the controller. Also, some of the features, including the Fantasy Football feature. There already are ways to check Fantasy Football or other features, including your cellphone, tablet, laptop/personal computer and even on your TV alone with the internet. I don't even play Fantasy Football, so I don't give a rat's hat on that one. Even if you use your Xbox One, you'll have trouble understanding the Xbox concept and graphics. Also the fact that you have to sign into the Internet. Three words: WTF?!
Also to the name.
Even though I like the name Xbox One, I thought Xbox 720 was a perfect name for the new Xbox, following a pattern that started with the Xbox 360, and would've gone back to the first one, Xbox 180. But apparently, Microsoft has gone the "Fast and the Furious" approach with the name. I wonder what the next Xbox name will be.

And now an UPDATE: It seems that Microsoft is doing a 180 (heh) on one of the Xbox One's policies involving logging into the internet every 24 hours. President of Interactive Entertainment Business Dan Mattrick suddenly announce that the XBO will no longer make gamers log into the Internet every day to continue gaming. I didn't talk about that when I originally typed this post, but opinion is that this also isn't a good idea for the console as users will grow frustrated at this, leave the XBO and buy the PlayStaion 4. This may also be too little, too late. But this has been a good move for Microsoft regardless. Here's what he has to say at the Xbox blog:

Anyway, i can't wait for the Xbox One to have more information released during E3 2013 next month. And I really can't wait for it to be released later this year. Oh, and what do you guys think? Tell me your thoughts in the comments section below or on my Twitter page @MaroonMondays.


Until next time, keep your pants on. See ya later.

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

MM: Billboard Music Awards: My Review

Hi everyone. It is I, the Maroon Marauder once again with...something you may or may not look forward to reading. (And I'm still awaiting confirmation on the nickname)

The Billboard Music Awards aired last night. This years' show was hosted by actor/comedian Tracy Morgan. And I enjoyed it. Well, some of it.

It started with a performance by Bruno Mars. An amazing performance of "Treasure" that looked liked something from the 1970s. What puzzled me is that everyone (Bruno and his bandmates) wore the same thing. The same thing.

But I didn't freak out because every time I see Bruno Mars perform, he and his band always wore the same thing. If that doesn't creep you out, then there still are some things that will.

Next was Selena Gomez with "Come and Get It". It was slow but sweet at the same; mostly because it had an Indian theme. True story, but the first time I heard this song, I thought it was about food, mainly because of the hook "If ya ready, Come and Get It (Na-Na Na NAAA)". Then I thought it was about sex (and food). Then I noticed it was about Justin Bieber; would've been better if it was about food and sex (thinly veiled, of course).


Later we had The Band Perry performing "Better Dig Two". Only minimalist here; just the band some dancing, and those lights you see at EDM concerts. Then they banged on some drums. It was a little boring, but still great to watch.


Then there is Icona Pop. I really didn't know who they were before last night, and admittedly, I really cared less. They performed "I Don't Care", which was the mood I was in when I saw the performance. I didn't see much, but all they did was walk around the stage with their name in incandescent lights, which fortunately I didn't have to see. It was a bore.


After that was...(gulp)...Chris Brown. (shudder)
He performed his latest single "Fine China", which, at first, I thought, hidden under the typical lyrics of falling for a girl, it was about giving China payback for the crap it gave us in the last (&#*@) years. But nope, only a typical song about falling for a girl. I kinda liked what was going on here; Chris...impressing a Chinese girl...on a set that looked too much...like China.

It then turned into a fake karate movie scene with ninjas falling down by Chris' world-famous dance moves.
They probably couldn't handle someone who got away with bea---sorry. Anyway, Chris ended his set being a product of Michael Jackson and Henry the Dancing Octopus (look him up) and did one of MJ's signature moves. Chris, you may not have been told this before, but I will tell you this. YOU'RE NOT MICHAEL JACKSON!

Next was Macklemore and Ryan Lewis performed their colossal debut hit "Thrift Shop" with Wanz. (I still don't know how to pronounce his name) Instead of on stage, the three performed from the Wynn Resort. I loved the vibe they had when they performed. Macklemore was all over the place with his fans singing every other line, while Wanz was his smooth swaggeriffic self...who sounded like he sang with a track.

It wasn't until a few days later when they appeared on 106 & Park to reveal that the performance was taped at an earlier date because of scheduling conflicts. Apparently they said they tricked us...so, great job, Macklemore and Ryan Lewis. You two certainly pulled the perfect prank on us. You sure fooled me! Heh heh heh...heh.

Okay then. Next up was--you know what? The show was three hours long and I missed the Simpsons for this, so I'll just say the rest of the show in a nutshell.
-Taylor Swift sang "22". As hype and colorful as it was, it was boring for me. A bunch as hipster-dressed teenagers "working" behind the scenes until they started dancing. The girl even used both halves of the stage. Everyone else used one half and I think it's unfair. Oh and Jabbawokees showed up, so it pepped me up a bit. And the song is kinda catchy.
--Then Kacey Musgraves sang "Merry 'GO Round". I've never heard of this girl...or this song...
--Next, Justin Bieber sang a new song called "Take You". It starts off with Justin in a small fake airplane full of foam like he's taking a full-body bubble bath. Then he dances with people looking straight out of a rundown airport. Later ends the performance back in the fake airplane. It was actually enjoyable to me. It was kind boring though, but I enjoyed it. Well done, Bieber. Well. Done.
--Pitbull and Christina Aguilera performed "Feel This Moment". Yep, the song that ripped off a-Ha's classic "Take On Me" into a song about being in the moment...of sex. Although I hate the song for that, I kinda like the performance. Not too hype, not too dull. It was actually perfect...until they bring out A-ha's frontman Morten Harket to sing the chorus of "Take on Me". I wouldn't mind him preforming with them if he sang more than that. But since he didn't, that was a waste of his time, and it made me hate the performance because of that.
Now here is the buzzworthy moment of the entire show.
Miguel adorning someone... by jumping into them and hitting their head with his nuts.
Before that, he performed his bombastic, super-sexy, soon-to-be-a-classic single "Adorn".
He and his band were behind a screen for a questionable reason. After perform the majority of the song, Miguel kinda got in the moment and jumped over the crowd mosh pit and then hit a woman in the head with his foot and put another in a lock. Then he performed the rest like nothing happened. It was live televised event. There were people sitting in front of you. Something happened. Oh I more than enjoyed this. Loved the song and this performance. But let it be learned for Miguel to be careful doing that again. There will be a time when it happens again, a fan says "I'm cool with that. I got to meet Miguel!" and later sue him for physical assault with a deadly weapon...his balls.
Later British quasi-heartthrob Ed Sheeran sang "Lego House", a song clearly not about Legos, yet is about a house. It was a short and sweet stripped performance and it actually kept my attention the whole time. This guy is really talented, and this one of the most wonderful moments of the night. And to me, there weren't many.
JLo and Pitbull (again??) performed "Live It Up". I was mostly focused on her outfit, which didn't involve pants. Other times she was dancing with some guys. This was an awesome performance, this coming from a guy that you all think is a pervert. A Howard Wolowitz pervert.
will.i.am (or William as the elderly like to call him) performed "(pound)thatPOWER" with Justin Bieber. Ugh (Jeez the producers sure like Justin Bieber.) First off, why is this song have a title like that? You can call it creative; I call it stupid. Then the performance starts off cool with William and Bieber popping up from under the stage, beginning the song. Then it got bad from there when William started "rapping". And they used both halves of the the stage. Really producers? Of all times in the show, would've you just give to someone worthy of it, like, say, Prince? Nope, just give it to Taylor Swift and William--I mean will.i.am. (Sigh)
--David Guetta is next with Akon and Ne-Yo in second position with "Play Hard". It was an exciting performance. Yeah.
--Nicki Minaj (huh) performed "High School" with black, braided water lizard Lil Wayne. There was a lap dance. I can't say anymore because I didn't like it. At all.
--And finally, the moment we've all been waiting for. The legendary Prince, the man who was the crooner before "crooner" was a word.
--Earlier tonight Prince was the recipient of the Billboard Icon award, which was well-deserved. After the tribute video, Prince took the stage and killed it. He killed, slayed, shot, stabbed and kissed the stage goodbye. He performed slowed-down, rock-n-roll version of "Let's Get Crazy" and "Fix Ur Life Up". I really don't have to tell you about it. The man deserves the title of icon and Billboard giving him the Icon award was an understatement.

Well, that (finally) it. All the show reviewed by me. Stay tuned for my black-guy interpretation of the 2013 BET Awards. You might just find this the bomb-diggity shizzle fo' nizzle mah jiggaz. Or I'll just type it in English. That'll be much better to type. Bye!

Thursday, May 16, 2013

MM: The creepy baby doctor is guilty; NBC is not

(This is a repeat form Monday, Msy 13, 2013. I again apologize for the lateness)
0.
Hi again everybody.

It's once again time for Maroon Mondays. The new event that everyone has been secretly waiting all week fo. Before I get to this week's stories, must apologize for being so late. Apparently the internet connection was down (my mom shows up took it from me.

Now, have you heard about this guy Kermit Gosnell? No, then blame the cable news networks. They were to busy with the Jodi Arias trial. Now that trial has no interest in me, but this has. And why be focused on a woman who killed a man when the bigger story is a man who killed FOUR FRIGGING BABIES?!?
That's right. Kermit Gosnell is a doctor who owns an abortion clinic in Philadelphia. One fateful day he ended the lives of 4 aborted fetuses, but the twist is...that they were still alive. Skip years later, and the man was charged in the death of those babies. Oh and have I mentioned that he also killed a woman? Now today the verdict has been read. Gosnell has been found guilty for 3 of these counts. He has also been found guilty for the death of the woman, 45-year-old Mongar. Why he hasn't been found guilty of the fourth death is beyond me.
Now this is a creepy man. Yes he was an abortion doctor, and his job was too-you know, abort (Can't say what it means; it's sickening). But when the news broke that the babies that were killed were ALIVE? It sickened me, as much as the rest of the Philadelphia area. What kind of person would do such a thing? Well not even an abortion doctor would have the balls to take a baby's life, even in this position. The creep then stuffed the corpses into a freezer. (Excuse me while I try to keep myself for vomiting) For anyone to work for this guy shouldn't put a lot of shame onto themselves. It's not their fault that they hadn't known about any of this going on behind their backs. And now that this trial has ended as quickly as fast as it began, we shouldn't have to hear more about this guy because he's going to jail for what has to be the rest of his life. He doesn't have to kill any more babies anymore. And his license is provoked and his clinic is closed. May he rot in hell and and never kill again.
And speaking of kill, let's talk about NBC.

Now last week the broadcast network began it's road to the end of the 2012-2013 television season by cancelling some of its shows-most of them comedies. They are-in no particular order- Go On, Whitney, The New Normal, Animal Practice, Guys with Kids, Up All Night and 1600 Penn. They all were low-rated sitcoms with varying degrees of critical success. They have all struggled in their time-slots since the beginning of this season and ended in the same fashion. But the Peacock was frustrated with the end result and decided that next season, it needs to start fresh. And that's what it did, by giving a big brown bear named Cancellation the comedies that it give a big amount of promotion, two of them the size of the MOTHERLOVING SUMMER OLYMPICS!! Unfortunately, not a lot of people stayed to these shows and the Peacock's plan of giving all watch TV a variety of laffers to enjoy failed. And now it must ride into the sunset with its 5 dramas and 2 comedies in the backseat (and The Voice and Parks and Rec sharing shotgun, of course) with a new batch of comedies in boxes, ready to be unveiled next fall.

Now a short opinion: Most of these show I really liked. I made sure every week that I'd watch every episode. Now I don't like some that much (AP, 1600P, GWK) and all that I love (Whitney) but they all were enjoyable. I was a little pissed when NBC announced that they were cancelled, but understood why. It wants to start over and start fresh, and I don't blame being that NBC was the fourth-place network for eight seasons, has finally come out of the ratings basement to become #1 in November sweeps and wants to have that happen again next season. I hope this new shows have better hopes than the last. And Community better be lucky to walk away from the bloodbath, because I will laugh at it when is's cancelled next season.

Well I'd better go to a shower after all this. See ya later.

Saturday, May 11, 2013

Tell Me What You Want to Hear

Hey folks. I almost forgot to mention. If there is anything you want me to talk about., please tell me on the comments section. And also follow me on Twitter @MaroonMondays. Anything you want...well, except Justin Bieber. Yes I know, he's awesome material, but my hands are tied on him.

MM: Jodi Arias Trial and Cleveland House of Horrors: My Thoughts

Hi everybody.

You know this week has been filled with two shocking news stories that gripped the nation and the world. That is the Verdict in the Trial of the insane (and hot) Jodi Arias and the Rescue of three Cleveland women kept in a house by Ariel Castro, a very horrible man who probably was good at improv. So instead of informing you about the two big stories of the day (I;m sure you already had), I'll give you my thoughts on them both. Even though I don't watch much news, so here we go.

Now the Jodi Arias trial was been one huge thing in people's minds for the last four months. A woman accused of killing a man (in this case Travis Alexander) who broke her heart, so she took the "If I can't Have You No One Can" route and shot him, stabbed him 27 times, and slit his throat. Since then she went to court battling it out with prosecutors saying "This bitch killed her ex-squeeze" disguised as the hundreds of words over the course of four months. Now you would be shocked to read this, but I was sorta/kinda believed some of the things she said. But then I gut puzzled when the prosecutors said she was a compulsive liar. This trial had more twists and turns than a typical episode of Scandal. Then came the moment of Verdict. Arias was found guilty for first-degree murder. I was happy, but admittedly, a little sad too. But usually that's how I feel when other famous people are in televised court cases. Casey Anthony. Michael Jackson. OJ Simpson. Phil Spector. Anna Nicole Smith. Roman Polanski. Samson. She was clearly stone faced when the result was read, letting me think that she knew she would be convicted. And when she said in a TV interview that she would take the death penalty, I thought that she should take it. People who kill people should be killed. (Even though I don't believe in the death penalty)

And now to the story of the Cleveland House of Horrors. From 2002 to 2004, three women (Michelle Knight, Amanda Berry and Gina DeJesus) disappeared. years later, it turned out that they were kidnapped by a man named Ariel Castro. During those ten years, the women suffer abuse, rape, unwanted pregnancies (and miscarriages) being chained to walls, and losing contact with their families and the outside world. Apparently, stories of abduction soften me up. And if the people abducted are found I thank God and dance like nobody's watching. This time I did that and then some. I absolutely loved the man who saved them: Charles Ramsey. A very colorful character with a great humor (sometimes when he's serious), this guy was also brave to come to Amanda Berry's rescue. Also the 911 operators were total dicks; they were supposed to comfort them, not rush them so they can hag them up later. But what also makes this story amazing is the daughter of berry who survived the Hell her mother and the two other women endured and come out alive. I wish them all a great life, while I wish Castro (and his brothers, who took part in this)a good life in Hell; he needs to rot there.

So as these stories reach their ends, remember that the good things will come to those who need it, and the bad things WILL have a price. The bad guys (Jody Arias and the brothers Castro) will suffer, while the good guys (the Cleveland Four and the Family of Travis Alexander) will find closure and a new life ahead. And I enjoy the ending to that story.
See you later.

Tuesday, May 07, 2013

Racists crying foul at USC

Hi everyone. Sorry for the lateness.
Well there is a sad case "calling someone a bad name" at USC las week. This all happened at a party near the university's camp where 400 African-Americans were attending. The LAPD responded to a noise complaint, so seventy-nine officers came, with riot gear. (sigh) Some students believe this was racial profiling. Some students made cell phone videos and sent them to YouTube.

A student-run Newspaper reported that the LAPD said that they responded to the complaint, which was sent at 2am on Saturday, by telling the DJ to turn down the music, to which the DJ complied. The party goers then reportedly refused to leave and threw bottles at the officers (Sigh again), who called riot squad. Six students were arrested while an officer was hospitalized for injuries. There was also a party across the street with predominately white students, but no one was arrested.

I'll stop there. Listen, you'd think the LAPD were the bad guys here, but no. It's the idiot students for acting like fools. Don't get me wrong, I like a good party once in a while, but a rowdy party that disturbs the peace isn't my style. In this case it's a party with a bunch a black kids bumping and grinding on each other to loud creepy music, drinking excessively, and doing things they would regret later on. And before you call me a racist, because you will anyway and you haven't read the whole thing yet, keep in mind that I'm black and even I have standards to living my life. Those I've mentioned are not it. Although I don't blame them for the racial profiling thing, as there was another party with white students but not one disturbance was reported. Although I didn't hear anything about that party, which makes me puzzled on whether or not the racial profiling makes sense.

Anyway I don't think the LAPD should be hated for this. They were just doing their jobs. If they weren't called, the party would've gotten worse. And the students should learn from this. 1) Do not mess with the police 2) Don't make yourself an embarrassment to your race; and 3) Make sure that it's racial profiling when the white kids' party is louder and rowdier than yours.

Good night folks.

Monday, May 06, 2013

Maroon Monday event

Welcome, everyone, to the first ever Maroon Mondays event: Maroon May. Here I'll talk about the usual topics but not one but two posts every Mondays, and third every Friday, and a bonus on any Random day of the week (or if I feel like it).

Oh and I like to announce today that This blog is now on Twitter. You will find released posts and retweets to stories I find interest to and/or might talk about here, and I'll also answer some questions from readers (SOME, not all; I will answer stupid or disgusting questions). All you can follow at one page. We're at @MaroonMondays.

So that's it. I'll see you later today for the first Maroon May post. See you soon.