#1SW: Dave the Barbarian

Welcome to 1 Season Wonder, a segment of Maroon Mondays. Here's how it goes.
I scour across the Internet and find TV shows with only 1 season, watch them, see if I enjoyed them, talk about them here and put them in a list of 1-Season Wonders. It sounds easy as it looks, right? No, you actually have to find these shows, watch through them hoping they're not as painful as they were the first time, and debate with yourself to see if it makes the list. If that sounds challenging and you want it that way, then let's do it.

Aaahh, the Medieval Times, where peasants live, dragons roam, denizens shop at he local mal--I mean marketplace, and one hero protects his city of Udrogath to stop the bad guys from taking it over...but he has to bake first. He's (and it's)
"Dave the Barbarian".

Created by Doug Landale, also creator of The Weekenders, another Disney animated series that I love to this day, Dave the Barbarian is the story of a Royal family in the city of Udrogath, King Throkmar and Queen Glimia, their kids Candy, Dave and Fang, their uncle Oswidge, Dave's talking sword Lula, and family pet dragon Faffy. King and Queen later leave town to take care of fighting evil from other places, leaving Candy in charge. Well, let's have the theme song explain.

(This video is part of a playlist that features all episodes, so you can watch as many as you want here.)

My God, I love this show.
The humor is awesome, its self-awareness is so thick, you can cut it with a knife. And yes, knives exist here. Speaking of, another reason I love this show, is because it doesn't care about historical inaccuracies. Anything from this and the last few centuries appear here. Yet you would be too busy laughing too hard noticing anything about it's anarchaic nature. All the characters are not paper-thin; they all have personality and likeness to them. Even the ones you didn't like had more to offer than others.

When it first premiered, I sincerly enjoyed the show. Even when in reruns, I enjoyed it. It was one on Disney Channel I loved watching...well, Besides The Proud Family, Kim Possible and That's So Raven. Even though I was a kid, I never cared for the amination the most. I loved the humor, the characters, the writing and the potential memes to come out of the show. Okay, maybe not meme, but you get the idea.
Why this show got cancelled in the first place is a huge mystery. I don't care if the content is too adult-focused for the kiddy-kiddy Disney Channel, despite the fact most of its shows feature adult humor some other shows probably won't get away with. And that's the point of the show and that's what makes it so funny. I can only wonder what would happen had the story continue into the second season (and maybe more). I blame whoever cancelled it; you better be happy to still have a job and give us some good DC shows, both live-action and animated. Whoever you are, you probably deserve the wrath of Chuckles. You know, the Silly Piggy!

Anyway, since it doesn't air on Disney Channel anymore, of course, you can find episodes on--uhh, that place with the videos and such. (I don't want the episodes of a show I truly like to be taken down by some @sshole from Disney. The people who uploaded them worked so hard to get them there, and they should be removed. People love these shows).

And that's why I chose these two shows. They're both funny in their own ways, I really enjoyed watching them, and I like the fact that I can watch them anytime I want on (that site) now. In fact, I'm watching right at the moment this post is released.

Favorite Character:

Main--Dave (duh). It's one thing to have the strength of Hercules, but to have the effeminate nature of Kronk added on to it is genius.
Recurring--Chuckles. Anytime he appears he steals the show. His words (and hamminess) is why he is so awesome. I don't care if he is a villain. He just rocks.

Favorite Episode:
I could say them all, but I must choose one. And that is...the one with the musical about meat. Forgot the title.

And there it is, Dave the Barbarian, the seventh addition of the 1 Season Wonder segment, added to the list of 1 Season Wonders and however chosen to cancel it, seriously deserves to get a beat-down from Chuckles.


Thank you all for joining me today and yesterday for this special edition of 1 Season Wonder. This segment will take a break for now, because three series joined the Hall of Shame this month in a schedule out of whack. 1 Season Wonder will return in July with a series featuring the fakest band this side of television...until one of the members got shot and died. It's just sad.

An remember if you have a series you love that only had one season under its belt, please tell me on Twitter and Facebook.

#1SW: The Buzz on Maggie

In a world of...bugs, one young woman will do whatever it takes to...become a rock star. Sorry, I ran out of creative intros. But I'd rather not waste sleep on this one.
It's "The Buzz on Maggie".


Maggie wants to be a rock star. And because of that I want to say this:
Maggie is just like every other teenage female character on a Disney Channel show.
She has a dream; She wants to live said dream; She'll do anything for that dream; She's happy, sweet, cocky and confident; and gets into trouble every other day in the process. Plus she probably did that bumper where one says "Hi, I'm [actor name] from [show name]. And you're watching Disney Channel", and then grabs a glow-stick and draws the (previous) Disney Channel logo.
That's the cliche here. In this case, Maggie wants to be a rock star, yet I've rarely seen her sing a note, I've rarely seen her play (or even hold) a guitar outside the opening credits, and I've never seen seen her doing anything remotely rock-star-ish on this show. (Note to the producers of any upcoming television show: if you want your show to feature a main character wanting to go into the music business, have them do something that has anything to do with music).

The other characters are stuck in Maggie's crap: older brother Aldrin (nice name for a jerk, by the way), little brother Pupert (sweet as he is annoying), parents Chauncey and Freida, and her best friend Rayna (a girl that really doesn't have to put up with this). By the way, do you guys notice that everyone in Stickyfeet is wearing white gloves? That's a homage to the Mikey Mouse cartoons. Also, this series was animated with Adobe Flash, the first Disney cartoon to do so; for those who care to know.

"The Buzz on Maggie" is created by Dave Polsky, premiering on Disney Channel on June 17, 2005, and ending June 3, 2006, with the pink slip being handed out a month prior in August, by some dude named Sean Szeles, who said on his blog that "Apparently good animation, art direction, and characters don't mean anything to Disney. The Buzz on Maggie is no more." This series is the second animated series on the network to be cancelled after one season, with the first being Dave the Barbarian.

Hey, I'm a sucker for Disney Channel animated series; I enjoy them. They're much better and well-produced than their factory of live-action programs. So if I can enjoy Kim Possible, The Proud Family, Dave the Barbarian and Lilo and Stitch then maybe I can enjoy this show. Too bad I didn't enjoy this one as much as I had enjoyed them.

The humor is there, and I like some of the insect-theme references the producers make, and I like the characters too (yes, Maggie, too.) What I don't enjoy is the fact that Maggie is so shallow and self-centered. No one likes these types of people, unless they have a certain amount of humility within them to be likable, and their actor (with voice or live-action) can pull it off. I do like Maggie, but it's that trait I can wish to get rid of.

Also I really don't like the element of showing gross things being shown up close. I hate that it's become a trend in animation these days, with half of the population going this route for a cheap laugh. It's good when done a few times; No one likes it being done to death. I'm talking to you, Seth McFarlane. Plus, this is a sad show; a reeeaaally sad show. Characters get hurt, Maggie doesn't have a lot for herself, and Pupert get beat up a lot. I don't like shows where characters get beat up and embarrassed a lot for quick laughs, but it's what we're used to these days, so I guess it what I'm used to, for better or worse.

Besides being animated, which I love because it can take stories much more places than live-action shows, I really like the idea of the series taking place in a town full of insects, instead of humans; it freshens the landscape up, and gives some great ideas to throw in. And some of the insect-themed names and media are kinda clever. So I'm very happy to have rediscovered this show and enjoy it while I can. I'd call this a "timekiller", a TV show you watch if you're feeling bored or if you're waiting for something to watch or happen, and need something to pass the time. There are many of them out there, depending on who you are and what your tastes are. The Buzz on Maggie (and the previous shows I've reviewed for this segment) are some for me.

Favorite Character: Pupert (He's not that annoying to me. I find him very enjoyable half the time. More than everyone else.)
Favorite (Half-)Episode: The Spelling Bees (a nice lampooning of The Beatles, except they spell instead of sing.)

You can find most episodes on YouTube (but don't tell anyone; Disney will slap a copyright suit on the person who uploaded them. The only time It'll care about its programs is when it removes them from YT or Dailymotion or whatever.


And there it is, The Buzz on Maggie, the sixth addition of the 1 Season Wonder segment, added to the list of 1 Season Wonders and even though it isn't great, It didn't deserve to get cancelled.

Tune in tomorrow when I give you guys another 1SW you'll be really excited to see, so excited, instead of "Yes!", you'll scream "Bajabbers!"
See you then!

POST 130: #LSMR--Hello Kitty

Hey guys. Welcome to the fourth and final Long/Short Music Review as part of Maroon May. And today it's one of the worst songs this year (and not so far) and probably of the decade so far. Everyone hated it because of how stereo-typically Asian it is, who the video is screaming in color and stiff,
Well, yeah; this. It's "Hello Kitty" by Avril Lavigne.

Yes, it's really bad; surprisingly, it's not horrible as I thought it would be, because I've never heard this song before. But I do hate dupstep, so I definitely won't hear it again anytime soon. The word "Cupcake" is used in every other line in the chorus, and yet I don't have a craving for some. This crap sounds completely different from Avril Lavigne's usual sound; seriously, I've listened to her from my years of listened to pop radio (and Radio Disney; I admit), and I've never felt so disappointed in an artist to change her style in the wrongest way possible. (Even Madonna and Rihanna did it right.) And when she sing "Stay with Me" and 'Play with Me", I cringe like hell. Her voice just doesn't fit here. Japanese words are used, and other things I won't get into.

And even though this song is titled "Hello Kitty", the song has nothing to do with Hello Kitty at all, despite the title. I barely hear "Kitty" in there, but that's not important or worth it.

You know what, let's look at the video.

It's screaming in stereotypical Japanese culture. The "background dancers are just standing there like planks of wood. And when they move, they're like robots; inefficiently-working robots. And they're EVERYWHERE. It's like something of a nightmare...or an episode of Kim Possible. The only time they show emotion is when they saw a picture of them and apparently like it.

(In fact its the only part of the video I liked; it's the only part where there's no monotony, hyperactivity or stereotypes)

Candy, more candy, not Candy from Dave the Barbarian, and even more candy that'll make you vomit. And everything in this video is so flashy and bright and colorful that it would make even the animators of Phineas and Ferb and the producers of The Price is Right go blind. Even the black and white scenes are flashy.
Cupcakes on Avril's skirt, cupcakes on a stick; cupcakes, cupcakes, cupcakes!!

I'm not surprised this song is almost universally hated, and I'm really not surprised that it's a hit in Japan. Just look at this satire of Japanese culture from SNL and you'l see how engrossed some Japanese are with the bright and colorful.

J-Pop America Funtime Now! from Kenny G. on Vimeo.

I'm not hating on them for their life choices and I shouldn't judge them; their's is more exciting than mine. My current wallpaper on my phone is a picture of Dipper Pines in a lamb costume doing the Lamby Dance. Nothing gets more weird than that.

And there it is: This piece of crap that shouldn't have been made.
Thank you for joining me this month for a special edition of Short/Long Music Review with 2 good songs and two shitty songs.
See you next month when I cut it back to one.
Bye-bye!

Will Smith's Daughter in Inappropriate Photo with Hannah Montana Actor (He's Shirtless)

Hey everyone. Well, this riled people up.

Willow Smith is in big trouble for being in a picture with a fellow in his bed, with her covering up, and the fellow not wearing a shirt. The fellow is 20-year-old Moises Aries, well-known as starring in Disney Hannah Montana. The picture has caused controversy with parents across the country and Willow's parents Will and Jada Pinkett-Smith are to blame because of their parental choices toward their kids.

I do see this as a big deal on one side of this coin. She is 13 years old, he's 20, they're lounging in a bed in someone's room, and he has no shirt on. This screams inappropriate. If my parents caught me in bed with a girl, and no shirt on, whether we're just talking or otherwise, they'd whup me until my back starts bleeding. If Will and Jada knew anything about this, they would've (or should've) sad No the minute the boy said "We're taking it in this bedroom", or something like that. This is inappropriate, unacceptable and plain wrong.

This is a No-no for these reasons:
--He took a picture of this an sent it to his Instagram account, from an unknown corner.
--Since he's friends with Willow's brother Jaden, he could've used it to boost his popularity and make him more well-known.
--It looked, from an obscured angle, like Willow has no shirt on because she's covering herself with a comforter.
--And finally, their parents knew nothing about it.

Even if Willow is aware of the picture being taken, she should be ashamed for this happening. Moises should be ashamed too; for taking the picture in the first place, putting it on IG, using it toward his advantage.

As for her parents, it's not their fault. They knew about it as long as we did. And they're just as disgusted and ashamed as they should be. I bet after this, they probably won't associate themselves with Moises anymore. And I won't blame them.

#MaroonMay--#LSMR: 3005

This week, I continue to find songs that most of us have never heard of (or want to hear of) in mainstream culture. Songs that weren't even an after-thought to us before I reviewed them. This time around, it's a song by an artist you may have heard of, but know much better from his career of acting. Donald Glover, known to millions (or hundreds of thousands, depending on if they actually watched the show on NBC) from his star-making role on "Community", lauched a rap career several years back, and has been received praise in the alternative industry for his rhymes and sound that's different from other rappers. I've heard a few of his songs before, and I have enjoyed them a lot, but I wanted to review this one, because it has become my definite favorite among his catalogue. I first heard of this song late last year, when my brother kept playing it every other night, and I was half-asleep. At first, I was annoyed by it. Also, it sounded like something HE made, because Gambimo sounds similar to him. And the ending sounded kinda creepy. But the beat was fantastic, and the chorus was very catchy. I never got a chance to ask him what that song was, so I kinda regretted never knowing what that song was through end of the year...until May 5th when I was waiting through an ad on YT to watch a video, when I noticed Childish Gambino sitting on a Ferris wheel with a deteriorating teddy bear. I tuned off mute, and there it was! That song I wanted to hear. And it has a name...which happens to be numbers.
It's "3005" by Childish Gambino.

As I hit play, I hear part of the chorus, in which Gambino says that no matter what, he always have the back of whoever he's talking about; maybe a friend, family member, significant other. He'll always be there for that person. See, we haven't reached the first verse, and I already noticed this song is already more warm and fuzzy than some of the songs I've already reviewed here. so let's get to the first verse.


So here, Gambino talk about his friends visiting him every weekend, which I assume he enjoys. But I have a feeling things might get a little worse later on.


I think here Gambino mentions the excitement of a song hitting the airwaves, and that he wants to celebrate that newfound fame of that song on the radio.
Sadly, Childish, that song you mentioned really didn't make it that long. It was better than the crap that made it at the top, though. And you did great in the UK.

Hah-hah! Get it? Patience" Doctor? Because a doctor has PATIENTS!! Heh-heh
Anyway; Wow, you really know it wouldn't last. Unfortunatly, he never knew that most song will never reach the top without the catchiness factor or a great beat to support it. But this song does. Why wasn't this song any more popular?!?!--And another thing. The only "Mufasa" I can remember from this is
Oh sorry, anyway, back to the song.

Okay, these lines don't make sense to me. All I got from that is "My house is your House", he met stripper named after a Palestinian city, he smoked a strange drug and now everything feels free-flowing. I guess "Volcanoes" does exist as an experimental drug.
That's that smart rap I'll never understand.

In tge second verse, Gambino says that if/when he becomes famous, his "friends and family" will turn into leacherous bloodsuckers who are only in his life for his money and fame, and if he becomes broke, they'll leave him and never give him he needs at this difficult time. But he hops that that special someone he cares for dearly will stay beside him no matter what. This song really packs an emotional punch with a nice amount or realism that orher rap songs really don't have. No matter how hard they try or want to try.
So in conclusion, this song is the best. This beat is absolutely awesome, the rhymes are perfect and message is very clear (and therefore very sweet). Always have your family's and friends' back, and they'll have yours, too. Even in the the toughest of times, they'll be there for you. Funny I just wrote that, because it really seems to me that this song is like a realistic version of the theme song of Friends; well, as wtitten by a black dude. I have this crazy thought in my head that my favorite hip-hop songs of all time is "Nobody's Perfect" by J. Cole, "F*ckin' Problems" by A$AP Rocky (both dirty and clean versions) and "Best I Ever Had" by Drake(yes; sadly no classics), but after hearing this song, I'll definitely rank it up there with them. It just rocks to me. And there it is; yet another song to review this month. Thank you for joining me. I'll see you next week for the final song to review during Maroon May. (Finally) See you next time!

MaroonMay Awards Reviews: Billboard Music Awards 2014

The Billboard Music Awards are back. Well, of course it is. It's an annual thing now. I hate it when the announcer keeps saying that as it it's dormant for nearly a decade. Well, it has, but it still annoys me.

Anyway, the show aired last night, and was hosted by rapper Ludacris. I think he did a really good job; he didn't crack jokes, he wasn't even trying and he really kept it together much better than last three hosts. I'm really tired of hosts of awards shows trying too hard to be funny and failing in execution. Unless you're a comedian, don't even think about it. And if you want to try, at least you're miles better than the guys from Shark Tank making a Solange Beats Up Jay-Z joke. That's not only not funny, that was just sad. Anywho, I didn't watch the entire thing, mostly because the good music that I know starts at the top of the show and wanted to sleep that night, so here we go.

--The first song is an anthem for the 2014 World Cup called “We Are One” by Pitbull, Jennifer Lopez and Claudia Leitte. I’ve never heard Pitbull sing, but I’m just fortunate that this is the only song he’ll do so. This was a really good song an worthy of the World Cup.

--The next one is OneRepublic singing “Counting Stars”. I freaking love this song. Especially when Ryan Tedder is raising his voice.

--Iggy Azalea performed “Fancy”. I don’t mind the song that much. But it’s annoying to me in the way that every female rapper makes a song about about how the glamorous life is...well, glamorous is enough to make me puke. Also her outfit is ridiculous. It’s so tight and so tacky, it’ll either rip off or flash someone. Or both. Straight after, Ariana Grande sang her latest hit, “Problem”, which features Azalea. The more I hear it, I more I begin to like it. It’’s a nice mix of Pop and New Jack Swing. The way she dances is so dorky. No matter how provocative she moves, it’s still dorky to me, because of how clean-cut she it. I hope she doesn’t turn out like Rihanna or Beyonce, though.

--Kevin O’Leary and Mark Cuban from ABC’s Shark Tank made a corny-ass joke about Solange beating Jay-Z in an elevator. "It's not funny" doesn't really scratch the surface. Too You could hear the awkward laughter from one of them as much as the boos from the audience. They later announce...
--Florida Georgia Line, who sang (or twanged) their latest hit, which is obvious to be a hit, "This Is How We Roll" with Luke Bryan. Florida Georgia Line sing-rapping will never win me over. After “Cruise”, I’ll never set a bar so low for them. And I don't like much of Luke Bryan's music. He's like the country equivalent of Drake. Nothing but drinking and butts now.

--Shakira sang “Empire”. It’s so, so moody. And I hate that the chorus being just Shakira saying some word so incoherent, I could think it’s something else like “But No More”, making it sound like a rape song. Which probably explains the beat. And the “Ooh-ohh-ooh”. Seriously, this is a song about having sex; please make it sound less moody. Really, I do really like it, but it’s too sad for me.





Before she introduced the next act, Kendall Jenner had a little (a lot of) trouble reading lines from the teleprompter. She just butchered every other line. "Guys, I'm the worst reader", she said. So I tweeted this.

Wow. You can't read, Kendall Jenner? What a shock. #BBMAs

— Maroon Mondays (@MaroonMondays) May 19, 2014

Much, this is your co-host for this years' Music Video Awards; you better hope she does better than this come next month.

--I’m sorry, but anyone who compares a band to The Beatles in any way is worthy of a sin. That’s just almost sacrilege. But the band in question is 5 Seconds of Summer, a band I’ve never heard of until the promos came on TV. They’re a nice band, and the song they performed is a pretty good song called She Looks So Perfect (...well, not later-era The Beatles), and it’s perfect for Summer. So I wish them luck. They're boys, they're in a band, and they have the cuteness appeal for little girls. So I wouldn't be surprised if they end up held against their will by the music industry in a few years to churn out hits. Kinda like a Sev'ral Times type-of-situation.



--Katy Perry, direct from London, sang "Birthday". Her and her dancers look like they came straight from the Betty Spaghetti box. I really like the beat of the song. 80s synth and trumpets all around, but a song about sex on your birthday seems boring. No matter how unique the Birthday element of cutting your cake is, it’s just sounds the same.

--After a long break of drumming, which is annoying to me now, Imagine Dragons performed a new song straight from the soundtrack of “Transformers 4”, called “Tiptoe”. For a title like that, the song has to quiet and smooth to fit, right? For a band like Imagine Dragons and a movie franchise by Michael Bay, the answer is a definite NO.

--HOLOGRAM MICHAEL JACKSON!!
Seriously, this is one of the best performances of the show. It looks so very life-like, it's almost creepy. And his song ‘Slave to the Rhythm” is really good. Congrats to the company that made the performance happen.

--Another World Cup anthem. This one called “Vida” by Ricky Martin. I don't hate them.
So the more anthems sung by artists not from America, the better, I guess?

--Later I saw Justin Timberlake accept an award, and in his acceptance speech, he thanks everyone in the world. Really, everyone. That is...except Donald Sterling. That got me riled up and immediately tweeted this on my personal Twitter page.

Sure Justin. Thank all the rapists serial killers & bigots on Earth...but not Donald Sterling. Yes he's bad; but not like all of them #BBMAs

— Andrew Pollard (@APollard36) May 19, 2014

And I don't blame him. Sterling deserves all the hate he can get, but I still felt a little off guard by that. Everyone (including rapists, killers, predators, egotists, bigots...and me). Maybe it's just me.

And now, this years' Winners. Some were expected (half for Lorde.)
Top Artist--Justin Timberlake
Top New Artist--Lorde
Top Male Artist--Justin Timberlake
Top Female Artist--Katy Perry
Top Duo/Group--Imagine Dragons
Top Touring Artist--Bon Jovi
Top Billboard 200 Artist--Justin Timberlake
Top Hot 100 Artist--Imagine Dragons
Top Digital Songs--Artist Katy Perry
Top Radio Songs Artist--Justin Timberlake
Top Social Artist--Justin Bieber
Top Streaming Artist--Miley Cyrus
Top R&B Artist--Justin Timberlake
Top Rap Artist--Eminem
Top Country Artist--Luke Bryan
Top Rock Artist--Imagine Dragons
Top Latin Artist--Marc Anthony
Top Dance/Electronic Artist--Daft Punk
Milestone Award Presented by Chevrolet--Carrie Underwood
Icon Award (previously announced)--Jennifer Lopez

And there it is: my review of the Billboard Music Awards. I enjoyed almost all of the show, more than others. The joke abut Solange and the second speech by Justin Timberlake (in which he thanked everyone on Earth...but Donald Sterling.) really went the wrong way for me. I didn't like them at all. The rest of it I enjoyed. Even if ABC is using it to pimp out it's newest (probably one-and-done) singing show Rising Star. I mean really, the judges and host appeared on the show.

See you next month for my reviews of the MuchMusic Video Awards and the BET Awards. See you next time!
(and maybe a weekly review of Rising Star; that's up to you guys.)

Rihanna Mocks Fan for Dressing Like Her

Everyone has a style, and sometimes they get a little protective of it. Example: Rihanna. Known for her revealing fashion sense, Rihanna goes to many popular events and wear very "down-to-there" outfits that leaves jaws dropping. That would be the case when a female fan, 16-year-old Alexis Carter decides to take a page out of Rihanna's book by making an outfit similar to her's and wear to her high school's prom.

Here's Alexis' look.

And here's Rihanna's.


Pics of the girl and the outfit went to social media and went viral a few days later. And apparently, everyone didn't like it. In fact, they hated it, and began to mock her relentlessly since. Here's video about the story from the Fox affiliate in Baltimore.

“I was very offended. Why throw shade on it when you had on the exact same thing? The poses was different but the outfit wasn’t.”

What the Hell, Rihanna?
This little girl loved your style so much, she decide to imitate it. And yet, you refer it to the logo of the Wu-Tang Clan.

But if you

think it's right to mock a fan for dressing like you, you have another thing coming. If you were jealous of her outfit for looking better than yours, then you are the most stuck-up, jackass bitch on Earth. Alexis was inspired by your fashion sense, and wanted to dress like you. What's wrong with that? And for the record, this isn't even one of the most revealing and/or controversial outfit you wore in your career. So why make fun of someone else for wearing the same thing?

Also, shame on the people who created and trended the "PromBat" hashtag. You guys might as well be hypocrites. Sure, you think it's cool to slam some girl for wearing an outfit you think is trashy, but you probably wore something just as trashy (if not downright slutty) at your prom, making you just like Rihanna. Yes, people have worn bad fashion before, but making fun of someone for dressing like a celebrity on the subtext that that celebrity is shaming him/her for wanting to imitate that celeb's fashion--for no reason at all, mind you, makes you all and that celeb are horrible people.

In fact, people have been heavily criticizing the girl for "bitching and moaning about how big bad Rihanna tore her down for wearing the same thing. She's just a fame whore. She should go home and look prettier." for days on end. Uhhh...
did you jackholes not notice the tweet with the black, bold frowny face that she released JUST SEVEN DAYS AGO??

:( pic.twitter.com/tagcvWs9cn

— Rihanna (@rihanna) May 9, 2014

She did the same thing you did. She also criticized the poor girl for wearing the same thing she wore. And you all ate dick along with her, by following in her footsteps in doing the same thing. If you call her ugly for that, you might as well call Rihanna ugly, too. If only you understood logic.

Also some shit-talker also threw shade with this tweet.

"The Dark Thot Rises" is not my joke btw! I don't steal. #PromBat.

— bri. (@bigshitxtalker) May 9, 2014

Don't lie, girl. And yep. Shit-talker is in her name

And Rihanna responded...

“@bigshitxtalker: "The Dark Thot Rises" is not my joke btw! I don't steal. #PromBat.” Haaaa!!! Whooooose then????? They get it

— Rihanna (@rihanna) May 9, 2014

Get WHAT? They might do the same thing even worse and get less hate.

You all are just as sad and ignorant as her and her half-brained fans. Yeah, she did release another tweet that said "She gets it". Whether it came before OR after the ":-(" is beyond me. I think the latter came to save face and throw more shame on the girl. And speaking of that, how the fuck did you not notice the Wu-Tang logo next to it!?

You all called her an idiot for being a fame-seeking whore, but you all are idiots too for not noticing shade being thrown. In fact, by that same logic, Rihanna might as well have made her outfit look like it too. Just replace the pic of the girl with Rihanna and there's little difference.
Thank goodness she did have supporters, who rallied behind her and said the outfit looked great. I think it looks great, too. Odd, yes, but great nonetheless.

This poor girl just wanted to dress like her idol, and her idol metaphorically spit in her face. If that doesn't tell you that celebrities aren't really like us after all, then we live in a sad, sad, sad world. "She don't love her fans like she says she does," Alexis said.

Rihanna...shame on you.

#MMay--#LSMR: #selfie

Ugh.

Well, every time I listen to the radio (which is rare these days) I do hear a good song and five relatively bad songs. And that's on the pop stations. Hip-hop has some too, but after that some good R&B songs come in with a couple hip-hop that i actually enjoy. The reason I type this is because these days, radio have been taken over by songs that basically become famous for being on YouTube; songs like Gangnam Style, Harlem Shake, What Does The Fox Say? and currently Hello Kitty by Avril Lavigne. Songs that everyone of Mainstream culture (and half of the TV networks, especially ABC) will play over and over during commercials, scenes during shows, ect. whether anyone likes it or not.

One of those is a hit because of the popularity of the selfie--the practice of taking a random picture of yourself or you and some other people from a bad angle with your cellphone. It's a huge practice these days, especially on one's Instagram page and everyone's doing it; even I do it once in a while. So a group of guys deciced to take the selfie and turn its popularity into a song. And a very vapid song at that.
It's #Selfie by The Chainsmokers.

Okay. First off, this song has no lyrics to sing along to. It's just the words of some vapid obnoxious chick talking about some guy named Jason eyeing her while he's some other girl whose wearing cheetah. Jason must be a "I like you, but I'm using you for sex" guy. She then asks her friend if they'll go take a smoke. And thoughout the whole thing, she talks in a Valley Girl accent. I don't know is the whole club is themed like the high school movies the 80s, but that's what I get from this. And that's the first verse. So why is this popular? There's no way to remember these lyrics, unless you're diehard spoken word fan.

Now we've reached the chorus, which is just "(But first) Lemme take a #selfie". The beat is just like every other club hit, bumping bass, loud head-throbbing electronic groove and

Next verse, the girl wants to know which filter she should use to make her look tan: X-Pro II or Valencia.

Then she want to title pic, maybe "Livin wit my bitches (something else or other) :-)" Apparently I can't tell what she said because the music is too loud and the accent is a little thick. After that the chorus plays again.

And the third verse, Jason likes the pic, that rachet ho might've bought by Instagram followers, the girl has to puke (false alarm, she doesn't). They get shots, then they dance. Blah, blah, blah.

I'll just get to the point; I hate this song. It's loud, it ear-splitting, and it's so vapid, you might turn into a obnoxious, arrogant bitch just like the girl in the video. But...I believe that's the point. I think it's a satire.
It's a joke on those people who act those who go to clubs every weekend, acting like they're the life of the party, and take selfies of everything the see. It's mocking the people who act like that. Plus the video is a parody of such things, with some pics of some people and a few celebrities thrown in for good measure, because the Chainsmokers believe they are the icons of selfies.

Anyway, this song is good satire, I think, but very annoying satire, I believe.

See you guys next week for a much more likable song you WILL enjoy. I promise you.
See you later!

UPDATED: #MMay--He's Got 99 Problems-His Sis is One: Solange Knowles Beats Up Jay-Z in Elevator

Hi everyone.
Jay-Z got beat up by a girl!!

Seriously, though, in a closed-camera security tape released by TMZ, Jay, Solange, and her sister Beyonce walk into an elevator at a hotel, after a nice time at this years' Met Gala. Suddenly, Solange hits Jay, bashes Jay, and, after being restrained by Bey's security guard, kicks Jay all in under a minute. We don't know what caused Solange to lash out, but Jay might have said something that may have pissed off Solange, Beyonce, or both. Or Solange got drunk. That's the closest explanation I have to the fight, because I was to busy laughing hard at the video. The trio later left the place, with Bey and Solange leaving in one car, while Hov left in another ride.

Apparently, someone on the security team thought this was hilarious, and decided to record it on his/her phone and leak the vid online. That wasn't cool, though. Beyonce and Jay-Z are known as a very private couple, and everything they do behind the scenes is meant to be private. So it really wasn't nice for this video to leaked for the world to see the Knowles-Carter family's personal problems up close. But it was that damn funny though; seeing a woman beat up a man, well, the first time, though.

Why didn't Beyonce do anything? It's her sister and her husband in a fight; she should've done something to break them up. But you know what, she may have a reason not to come between them. She's probably shocked that this happened all so suddenly. Watching her sister hitting her husband is sad enough for us to watch, but you can only imagine how she felt when she Maybe she didn't like what Solange said.
I will give props to Hov being a true gentleman, for not hitting back at Solange. It's not cool at all to hit a woman, so I will give praise to him for that.

We'll see what happens from here, but if that fight had anything to do with Beyonce having a better career than Solange, than she should've taken it out on Beyonce; Not Jay-Z. And that would've been more hilarious.

UPDATE: Well, that was quick. The person who leaked the video was found and apprehended earlier Thursday. The worker was already fired when the vid was taped, so I assume revenge against the hotel? If so, he should know hotel don't give a crap about workers except when they do the actual word they're told to do...and when they want more pay. Charges will be issued and the dude/chick might get severely sued. That dude deserves what he gets; that security wasn't supposed to be leaked, and he/she wasn't supposed to leak it. And he/she knew it; whether it it was a normal civilian or a celebrity, you can't release security footage to the world unless it is important.
Thanks to that guy/woman, Beyonce, Jay-Z and Solange's personal issues are shown to the world for no reason. This guy/woman should be fired.

See ya later.

#MaroonMay: #BringBackOurGirls: Nigerian Girls Kidnapped by Terrorist Group

In some horrible news, 200+ girls from Nigeria were taken away from their school and kidnapped by a terrorist group called Boko Haram. In a video the group released last Monday, the group's leader says the girls are captured because of their education, and might be sold.

Later in the month, a video showing the girls reciting the Quaran was released

with a separate video showing the leader talking about the girls they've captured. He is in such a bragging mood.

This is disgusting. This group ruining the lives of these little girls just because they have an education. And why? The word "bigamist" cannot describe them enough. These are young girls that didn't ask for an education, but got one. And these evil assholes just believe the female is used to serve and clean and act condescending towards them. It's one thing if it's grown women, but this is little children we're talking about. They don't deserve this. At all.

This group must be given hell when found and taken into custody. I want the leader beheaded. And I wish for the end of Boko Haram. I hope these girls are safe; it's inevitable get hurt, though. They'll be beaten, but I hoping they are safe. In fact, I'm asking you guys to pray for these girls and their families. They need the faith and prayer to survive this horrible endeavor. They must come back home to their families. This group must be stopped, and they must pay for their crimes. If Malala Yousafzai can survive an life-or-death attack from the Taliban, then we can only hope these girls will be saved and will survive this horrible attack.

#BringBackOurGirls #BringBackOurGirls #BringBackOurGirls

#MaroonMay: Donald Sterling Apologizes for Being a Racist (and Stupid)

Hey, everyone.
Well, Donald Sterling won't keep his mouth shut.

In an interview with CNN's Anderson Cooper, Sterling talks about the controversial tapes in which he snaps at then-mistress, V. Stiviano, about the Instagram pic she took with legend Magic Johnson (mostly because of his race) and then turned the conversation into a huge rant about how V. shouldn't be associated with African Americans and how he takes good care of the Los Angeles Clippers, and how she should remove her race.

In an except shown below, Sterling talks about how Johnson is no longer a good example of the children and the entire black community of Los Angeles...and that he feels nothing bad happened.

If you did anything wrong?? Sterling, you did do something Wrong! You said in a recorded conversation, that you don't trust black people, and that your dime shouldn't associate herself with black people. You said the Clippers players deserve what he gives them, and without him, they'd be nothing. And now, you're talking to Anderson Cooper like you act like you've done nothing wrong!! Even if you had legitimate reasons not to trust black people, the rest of what you said was offensive and stupid. Who the hell are you to tell anybody, let alone your mistress, who you had full interest in despite the fact that she's half-Black and half-Mexican, not only to disassociate herself from all black people, but also that she should "remove her race"?! What's wrong with you, man? What's? Wrong? With you?! How much common sense do you think you have? Not only do you deserve disgust and hatred from the black community, you deserve it from many in the White community, too. And you oughta be lucky Magic Johnson isn't mentioning you at all. He doesn't need the crap he can take these days.

In another excerpt of the interview airing Monday night on AC360, he also asks for forgiveness (because, sure, why not?)

Sure, Donald. You can ask forgiveness; it'll take a while to get one from the African American race. What you said still will never disappear from the public conscience and the Internet, so whatever you have say, no one will believe or accept, no matter how honest you sound. Just take your money and go home. I hope you had a pre-nup signed, because your wife Shelly (who is as foolish and ignorant as you are) will just be in it for the money as she is for the interviews. And she says he has dementia. I really don’t buy it.

Yes, Donald. You did make a terrible mistake. All it took was a hot model you cheated on Shelly with, to record something you said your back, and release it to the world (or leak it, whatever) and now, that she succeeded in screwing you, you really have nothing to hate but yourself for the words you spew and the life you live. At least you’re rich; you can always fall back on the money you have besides the low common sense.

See you guys later.

MaroonMay Awards Reviews: iHeartRadio Music Awards 2014

Well...another awards ceremony. And I wouldn't mind the many awards ceremonies I want to cover if I get paid for this, like the editors at BuzzFeed get paid for the crappy lists and quizzes they write on their site.

The iHeartRadio Music Awards is just like the Billboard Music Awards, the American Music Awards, the MTV Video Music Awards, the MuchMusic Video Awards, the BET Awards, and even the Radio Disney Music Awards; it has a bunch a categories with metal statuettes to be given away at a ceremony, and celebrities show up. There will also be performances by whoever is popular at the moment and the networks try to secure musicians for the show and hope to stay to maybe grab an award. Understand?

Anyway, the first show aired last Thursday on NBC. There was no host trying too hard to be funny and it seemed very good. No awkward crap; Just performances and awards being given. I guess The producers know what's important here. I enjoyed much of what I saw. The performances were really good, if not great, and the award categories do kinda make sense, even if the songs nominated were released last year.

I didn't see the entire thing, so here are some highlights
--Pitbull kicked off the show by performing two songs, one I don't know the title of, and the other "Timber". I honestly didn't care for both, and his props (boat and women) look like they came one of his music videos. I was a little surprised Ke$ha didn't show up (and surprised that I'm surprised about her not showing up.)
--Bastille performed their first US hit "Pompeii". I actually liked it when they sang it live, much more than they recorded it.
--Ed Sheeran performed "A-Team" and "Don't" in a taped bit from somewhere else in LA. It was really good.
--Ariana Grande sang her smash hit "The Way" and her new hit "Problem". She sounded really great, and the new song is really good. I see an awesome career ahead of her. By the way, her dancing during the chorus was dorky and really funny. No wonder Rihanna laughed when they cutaway to her.
--The show later gave us a wonderful tribute to the legendary Michael Jackson. Usher, joined by a troupe of fantastic dancers who did a really good job, danced to a legitimate brand-new MJ hit, "Love Never Felt So Good". This is one of the best performances of the show.
--Thirty Seconds to Mars performed "City of Angels". It's a powerful song about life and happiness in a new city, to make a better life for you and your family. I loved it; I also like the taped commentaries of musicians and legendary street performers talking about lives in their hometowns and how happy they are in their new lives out west. So sweet and heartwarming.
--Kendrick Lamar gave a fantastic rendition to 2Pac's iconic love letter to the Golden State, "California Love" and his really great song "mAAd city". Really folks, he's just. that. GOOD.

Between performances, some recording artists taped "confessionals" or whatever about their lives and times in Los Angeles, and they were kinda cool, yet a little boring. Some were good to watch like Macklemore's, which had a funny story about extras vomiting on a pirate ship during filming for his (and Ryan Lewis') video for "Can't Hold Us". That was hilarious.

And now the WINNERS:
Best new Artist: Lorde
Hip-Hop/R&B Song of the Year: Rihanna-Pour It Up
EDM Song: Avicii & Aloe Blacc, “Wake Me Up”
Country Song: Blake Shelton, “Boys ‘Round Here”
Alternative Rock Song: Imagine Dragons, “Demons”
Collaboration: Pitbull featuring Ke$ha-Timber
Lyrics: Wrecking Ball
Fan Army (yes, this exists): Rihanna Navy – Rihanna
Instagram Award (yeah, that too): Austin Mahone
Young Influencer: Ariana Grande
iHeart Innovator Award: Pharrell Williams

Also I wanna mention that Rihanna looks like a glamorous version of Crazy Eyes from Orange is the New Black. I've noticed that from the first time I saw her, and probably you did too.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the review as much as you have the show. It was actually really good, I enjoyed all I saw and the performances were absolutely fantastic. I can't wait for next year, at least after the company goes through this lawsuit thrown against them.

Oh well, see you next time.

#1SW: Three's a Crowd

(This edition was supposed to be released early last month, but things got in the way.)

Welcome to 1 Season Wonder, a segment of Maroon Mondays. Here's how it goes.
I scour across the Internet and find TV shows with only 1 season, watch them, see if I enjoyed them, talk about them here and put them in a list of 1-Season Wonders. It sounds easy as it looks, right? No, you actually have to find these shows, watch through them hoping they're not as painful as they were the first time, and debate with yourself to see if it makes the list. If that sounds challenging and you want it that way, then let's do it.

Remember Three’s Company? Yeah? Well, it had a spin-off. No, not that spin-off. Yep, it had another one. And ooohh, the theme song.

It’s Three's a Crowd.

Three's a Crowd is a spin-off of Three's Company, one of the most iconic sitcoms of the 1970s, and one of the bustiest. Starring John Ritter as the clumsy, goofy and always hilarious Jack Tripper, Jack moves on from the life of living in a shared pad with two super-duper sexy ladies, to the life with another super-duper sexy lady, his girlfriend Victoria (let's call her Vicky), played by Mary Cadorette.

But standing in the way between Jack and Vicky (and her hot body) is Vicky's father James, (played by Robert Mandan of Soap and Search for Tomorrow) who really doesn’t like Jack and tries hard to destroy the couple’s relationship, but to no avail, as their strong love always prevails to the end. Vicky loves Jack, but doesn’t want to marry him yet because they might get a divorce like her parents did. So the show is about the trials and tribulations of their courtship and such.

Too bad she doesn’t know about Jack’s life on Three’s Company. Jack, a cook, owns a restaurant in Santa Monica, CA, called Jack's Bistro, with a slow-willed, but very cool and easy-going guy named...E.Z., played by Alan Campbell. Jack also owns an apartment just upstairs, where he and Vicky live. I also want to mention that it was strange that Jack and Vicky met and fell in love so close to the end of Three’s Company. I have heard of people who meet and go so fast into love so quickly, but to have this happen at the end and set that up as the basis of a spin-off is kinda weird to me.

This show (like its parent series) is based on sitcom in Great Britain. This is based on Robin's Nest, while Company is based on Man About the House. While the Company was a huge success from the start, Crowd was barely noticeable in the ratings, and did well enough for a bid for next season. Unfortunately, it didn’t. Ritter was in negotiations with ABC on the length of season 2. the network wanted 13 episodes with 9 more if it does good in the ratings, while John wanted the full 22 order. Since neither budged, the show ended for good.

I really like this show. In fact, I enjoy it a little more than the parent series. As much as I love Three's Company, I can do without the legs, boobs, sex talk and skin sweaters all the time. It just feels so light and sweet with as much of Jack retained here. And there's also some of the characters I like too; the sugar-and-spice personality of Vicky, the jerk with a heart facade of James, and goofy-yet-laid-back personality of E.Z. As I much as I will respect the decisions made by Ritter and the network, I wish this show would have go on with the 13-episode second season. I enjoy Jack’s wacky antics, the constant back-and-forth between Jack and James, the sweet scenes between Jack and Vicky, and...basically everything E.Z. does.

The show is currently in reruns on Antenna TV (for now though, you’ll have to wait for it to air since Three’s Company is currently on the schedule. I may let you know.) You may also find some episodes on YouTube, with the first episode at the top of the page. (Don’t read the comments, though; they’re kinda rough. Apparently, people remember Three’s Company fondly. Don’t blame them, but still.)

And there it is, Three's a Crowd, the fifth addition of the 1 Season Wonder segment, added to the list of 1 Season Wonders and that after show of Three's Company that didn't last...but has a wonderful theme song.

Tune in next time, when I have some special editions planned for you guys. I can't wait to show them for you during Maroon May. See ya then...